HomeDiscipling Dad

America's Ruling Class...

2010-07-22T09:20:00.000-05:00

I came across a fabulous article (HT Vox Popoli) that does a brilliant job of analyzing what is going on in our country with regard to how we are governed in this day and age. It is quite long and covers many, many different aspects of our culture, but regardless of length, it is worthy of your time. Print it out and take it with you so you can read when you have a moment.

Here is a small snippet from the section on families (Bold emphasis mine):

"While our ruling class teaches that relationships among men, women, and children are contingent, it also insists that the relationship between each of them and the state is fundamental. That is why such as Hillary Clinton have written law review articles and books advocating a direct relationship between the government and children, effectively abolishing the presumption of parental authority. Hence whereas within living memory school nurses could not administer an aspirin to a child without the parents' consent, the people who run America's schools nowadays administer pregnancy tests and ship girls off to abortion clinics without the parents' knowledge. Parents are not allowed to object to what their children are taught. But the government may and often does object to how parents raise children. The ruling class's assumption is that what it mandates for children is correct ipso facto, while what parents do is potentially abusive. It only takes an anonymous accusation of abuse for parents to be taken away in handcuffs until they prove their innocence. Only sheer political weight (and in California, just barely) has preserved parents' right to homeschool their children against the ruling class's desire to accomplish what Woodrow Wilson so yearned: "to make young gentlemen as unlike their fathers as possible."

At stake are the most important questions: What is the right way for human beings to live? By what standard is anything true or good? Who gets to decide what? Implicit in Wilson's words and explicit in our ruling class's actions is the dismissal, as the ways of outdated "fathers," of the answers that most Americans would give to these questions. This dismissal of the American people's intellectual, spiritual, and moral substance is the very heart of what our ruling class is about. Its principal article of faith, its claim to the right to decide for others, is precisely that it knows things and operates by standards beyond others' comprehension."

Well-Married: Something to Consider

2010-02-11T20:26:00.013-06:00

Among the many radio programs I podcast is Dr. Albert Mohler's daily show. For those who don't know, Dr. Mohler is president of Southern Seminary and was one of the courageous Christians who stepped into the gap for the Southern Baptists to halt their lurching slide into liberalism and return them to solid foundations. His program is usually a thoughtful commentary on the many social issues of the day.

On February 8, 2010, Dr. Mohler aired a program entitled, "College Campuses: Where Have All the Men Gone?" During that program, he states, "One of the main responsibilities of the people of God, that is, the local church, a local congregation, is to get its members well-married. And most churches don't even think about that."

Whoa! Now that's not something that is often heard!

When was the last time you heard a sermon exhorting the young men of your church to forego the trivialities of youth and prepare themselves spiritually, emotionally, and financially to take a wife and have a family? When was the last time you heard a sermon exhorting the young women of the church to prepare to be a wife and helpmeet to a husband and a mother to children rather than to prepare for a career?

When was the last time the leadership of the college group expressed the expectation that the young men were to drop out of the culture of perpetual adolesence, grow in maturity, and take one of the young ladies as a wife?

Our churches are woefully inadequate when it comes to the responsibility "to get its members well-married." The expectation isn't there. The theology isn't there. The teaching isn't there. The support isn't there. My own church is considered a beacon within the nation, an example to be emulated. And yet, even our nationally-known pastor emphasizes the fabulous things our young people should do with their singleness rather than emphasizing the normalcy of most to prepare for and to pursue marriage at a reasonably young age. This is most certainly NOT what Dr. Mohler is talking about.

If you are an elder in your church or a person of influence, consider what you can do to encourage your church to take on this responsibility.

But Dr. Mohler doesn't stop with the churches. He also states, "One of the main responsibilities of parents, even more urgently, is to get their children well-married." When was the last time you as a parent considered what you are doing as you raise your child? Is your goal a good education? A degree from a good college? Or is it something far more important, a "main responsibility"? Dr. Mohler goes on to say, "...as we think about how getting them raised and launching them in life is not only about education, it's also about getting them well-prepared for life, well-prepared for holiness and faithfulness, and well-prepared for marriage."

Look at what you are actually doing as a parent. Is your focus good grades, or if you homeschool, ensuring all the curriculum is completed so you can match up with your government school counterparts? Is your focus to get your child into every activity in which he shows an interest such that you are running yourself into the ground getting him to each and every one? Is your goal to get them into a good college? In other words...do you look like every other parent on your block? Do your priorities look like those of every other parent on the block?

Arguably, the last three things Dr. Mohler mentions in his quote rank as far more important than education.

Most of what passes for "education" in these days in no way prepares a young person for life because it has no relation to the real world. It is jumbled facts and figures to be memorized for a test. So step one is to ensure the "education" your child is getting is one that will prepare him for life (and typically, that isn't going to happen in a group school, but that's another post and another argument).

While the right education is important, it's not nearly as important as holiness and faithfulness, both of which are indicative of true, saving faith. Both holiness and faithfulness are also critical to withstanding the temptations of popular culture and to witnessing the true power of saving faith to those with whom our children come into contact. "Education" doesn't even stand in the shadow of the importance of the sure salvation of our children's souls!!!

Nor is it as important as preparing our children for marriage. Do we want them to be part of the divorce culture that is so rampant, even within the Christian community? Of course not. Then the assumption for all who are not gifted with celibacy (which is most) is that, properly prepared, they will spend most of their years married to a single spouse. It is critical that they be prepared to be the godly husband or godly wife that spouse needs in order to show the glory of God as witnessed in marriage. It is critical they are prepared for their Biblical role and that they know the theology of marriage so they form a family that is a safe repose from the world and a model of Christ's love to their neighborhood. This is the sort of family that avoids the snare of divorce, all the while spreading the Gospel. It's not something that just "happens," but rather is something for which there must be preparation. That preparation comes in the form of mentorship and training from parents; it isn't something that comes through osmosis!

So, Dad (and Mom)... how are you doing? Have these thoughts crossed your mind? If you have given them thought and acted upon your conclusions, bravo! If not, then take the time to consider them and strategize about them. Do what you need to do, radical though it may be, to start right now in guiding your children to become the young adults who 1) know, love, and obey Jesus Christ as their Savior, 2) are ready for life (the responsibilities of adulthood) at a young age, and 3) are ready to assume the responsibilities of marriage early in life.

Not only will your children rise up and call you blessed (moms) and sing your praises in the gates (dads), but you will be instrumental in putting one more family into the ranks of the Kingdom of God as we stand against the death-spiral of our culture.

May the Lord bless you in your efforts!

Glorious Preaching!

2010-01-29T13:56:00.001-06:00

In January of each year, our pastor takes two weeks and preaches on Racial Harmony and on the ProLife issue. After more than a decade at our church, I confess I was less than excited about attending during those two weeks. After all, what more could possibly be said that hasn't already been said? I've heard this message dozens of times...I got it! Right?

Well, repentance is in order.

Pastor Piper "hit the ball out of the park" in both sermons, delivering the message in a fresh, powerful way. And I am very happy I didn't go with my "feelings" and skip out.

For your edification and God's glory, here are the links to both sermons. They take you to a page where you can read the transcript, or listen, or watch, or download. While it's your choice, I'd go with watching or listening or downloading over reading...something about the way Piper preaches puts more power into the words.

Racial Harmony Sunday

ProLife Sunday

A Saint Goes Home

2009-10-12T14:50:00.000-05:00

Tracy Klicka details the last hours of Chris' life on this earth with a moving testimony on CaringBridge. Chris was one of the heroes of the homeschooling movement, working tirelessly to gain and keep this freedom for us.

Please pray for the Klicka family as they both grieve and rejoice for their husband and father.

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/chrisklicka

Childlike Joy...

2009-09-06T11:14:00.004-05:00

As I was out walking our puppy and enjoying the beautiful end-of-summer weather, I noticed how he took note of everything from the stray leaf to the (to my eyes) unseen insect. There was an excitement and a joy to all he saw. He would pounce on a leaf and then chase it if he missed. It caused me to ruminate upon a time when our children were very small, especially our first-borne.

I recall sitting with her out in the back yard of our home and noting how much joy she found in the smallest of things, from a dandelion flower to a leaf to a bug. It struck me at the time how, in her eyes, it was all new and exciting, whereas to me as an adult it had become routine and mundane. That thought was renewed as I watched our puppy play.

It made me also think of how Jesus asks us to come to him "as little children." Often we interpret that to mean "childlike faith" or "faith that doesn't think too much!" Instead, maybe we should think about the joy that a new Christian (babe in Christ) has as he sees for the first time the beauty of his Savior, as he reads the marvelous words of Scripture with new eyes, as he rejoices in the smallest moves of his God. Do we as "mature" Christians still do that? Or has it become routine and mundane? Has our worship become fitful and routine? Has our Scripture reading become blase? Have we lost the wonder that the Creator of the universe condescended to become a helpless baby in a manger? Has the thought of God Himself dying a torturous death on a Roman cross become just another "given"?

Sadly, I know from experience that the answer to those questions is at some point in a believer's life, "yes."

Do you remember the wonder and joy you had as a new believer? Do you desire to regain that?

Jesus desires that for you. Remember His admonishment of the church in Ephesus, that they had abandoned their first love. He wants your love...as a first love! So give it to Him.

Read His Word with anticipation of the Holy Spirit illuminating it in your heart. Pray (and listen) with the knowledge that the Father hears you. Watch for the little things each day that point to a God Who cares for the smallest details of your life, even when it doesn't look like things are going the way you would have planned. He numbers the hairs on your head! Consider where you came from and that you have a Savior who made it possible for you who were an enemy of God to become an adopted child of the King! Take time for Him in meditation on His Word and in prayer, not as an evangelical "quiet time" duty, but rather as an intentional desire to draw closer to Him in all aspects of your life. When the King commands something for you, His adopted child, in the Scripture...then DO it! Do it both because He is King and because He is your loving Father, Who wants the best for you. And in doing His commands not out of a desire to gain favor, but out of a desire to please your Father, you show you LOVE Him.

And that childlike joy and excitement will once again be yours.

Come to Christ!

2009-07-16T23:39:00.007-05:00

In all we do as humans, as husbands, as fathers...nothing is as important as knowing Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior. This wonderful short video put together by the folks at IllBeHonest.com featuring a portion of a sermon by Paul Washer does a powerful job of making the call to "Come to Christ!"

I Killed My Dog...

2009-05-01T12:25:00.003-05:00

A bit over a week ago, our precious companion of over a decade died, leaving behind a family with hearts broken from the excruciating pain of loss. (I posted a tribute to him HERE.)

It's one thing to talk of death and dying, and quite another thing to see it up close, to see breath and life (even life that is in the midst of uncontrollable seizures) one moment and then to see stillness and death the next. Death is ugly. Death is hideous. Death is sinister. There are no redeeming qualities in death. Yet, death is a fact of life, the ultimate end of all living things.

Why? Why did my furry friend have to die? He never commited a single sin; there was nothing in him that warranted the sentence of death. At least with humans, we know they themselves sinned, and thus brought upon themselves the penalty of death. Not so with animals!

The answer is both simple and frightening: He died because I sin.

It is my sin, and the sin of all humans that causes the entire world to be under the curse of death, groaning for the day of redemption (Romans 8). In effect, I killed that beautiful creature because I sin. He didn't deserve death, yet death sought him out because of me.

What does that mean? It means I must quit shrugging off my sin as something minor. It's not minor. Every sinful action, inaction, or thought is an affront to a holy God and results in death. Sin is NOT minor; it is like death: ugly, hideous, and sinister. My outlook to my sin needs to change such that I see it for the horridly awful thing it is. Some of the saints of the past (Owen, I think) referred to the need to "mortify" your sin. In other words, as Christians, we are to see the sin for the ugly thing it is and kill it!

How does one do that? First and foremost is to be in the Word, for without that, you don't even know what your sin is! The Word will slice and dice your heart to the point of showing every little speck of ugliness. Take each speck and kill it with prayer, repentance, and the help of the Holy Spirit. In repentance, don't walk, but run, to the foot of the Cross where you can find forgiveness. With that forgiveness comes new life as we become more and more like Jesus, our Savior, Redeemer, and Friend. With that new life comes the hope of heaven where we know the ugliness of sin and death is defeated and banished for all of eternity. No more will we hurt from the pain of loss. No more will we fall into sin and ugliness. No more will we fail our Father. No more will any of our beloved die. And no more will we be separated from the glory and joy that is our God in Jesus Christ!

Maranatha! Come soon, Lord!

A Tribute to My Faithful, Furry Friend

2009-04-26T18:04:00.005-05:00

Nikolai 7/13/89-4/24/09

Those who have never experienced the devoted love of a wonderful dog have missed out on one of God's greatest gifts. We speak so often of unconditional love, but God has given us a real-life example of it in the love a dog has for his "pack."

Nikolai was such an example. For ten and a half years, he has been by our family's side, through ups and downs, through moves, through daily life. He never once complained if we forgot about him, yet he always rejoiced when we included him. Walks were something to be celebrated, even when they might have been a bit long in warm weather for a heavily-coated dog. Rides in the car were always anticipated...even when they ended up at the vet! It really didn't matter, as long as he was with one of us.

He loved homeschooling! Why? Because it means we are home! He spent many a happy hour curled up on the coach with mom and daughter as they worked through assignments.

He was a "rock star!" Wherever we went, Nikolai was the center of attention with people of all ages stopping to admire and pet him. He gave love to all he encountered in life.

When he was younger, he loved playing "soccer" with a basketball. When there was just a bit of snow on the ground, he would chase the red dot from a laser pointer around the entire yard. He was fabulously beautiful to watch when he ran...long, loping strides with that beautiful tail unfurled behind him.

And that smile. He smiled a lot, even when he hurt from his infirmities, because he was happy to be at home with us.

Then he got sick, and we got to give some of that love back by nursing him back from near death to a healthy weight. And throughout it all, he never quit smiling. His gentle nature allowed him to put up with innumerable shots, needle-pricks by inexperienced, but loving hands, and pill after pill after pill.

And then, without warning, it all ended.

If the depth of the pain and the number of tears shed are any indication of the love we had for him, then he was the most loved puppy in the world.

Yet in the midst of this deep, deep grief, we praise God for the gift he gave us in Nikolai. The joy we have received from him over the years more than makes up for the seemingly insurmountable pain we are experiencing right now. God is near the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18), and that is our family.

Please Lord, draw near....

Piper on Suffering

2008-12-28T23:22:00.004-06:00

John Piper frequently describes life in these United States as a "Disneyland." Think about it for a minute. Do you raise your children with eternal perspectives in mind? Do you raise them to know the lordship of Jesus Christ? Do you raise them to allow their lives to be shaped by the Scripture and not by the world?

Or do you raise them with all the "opportunities" this world provides...opportunities that will entertain and distract from what is truly important?

This video is an excerpt from a sermon delivered to a stadium full of college-aged students, enjoining them to suffer for the sake of the Gospel. If one stands against the tide of this world, one will suffer in some way, shape, or form. It may just be ridicule... or as the world darkens, it may be martyrdom. Are you ready?

John Piper - You Must Suffer from I'll Be Honest

No, Lord!

2008-12-02T20:55:00.008-06:00

This week I was listening to Kevin Swanson's radio broadcast, "Generations," when I heard a two-day presentation of a sermon by Dr. R.C. Sproul, Jr as delivered to Swanson's church's family camp a few years ago. It is fabulous! (Part one can be heard HERE, and part two HERE. To download, go HERE and look at broadcast dates December 1 and 2, 2008.)

I'd like to reflect on just one small part of the sermon.

R.C. spoke of the "R.C. Sproul, Jr. Principle of Hermeneutics" ...namely, when you see someone in the Bible doing something really stupid, don't ask how they could be so stupid. Rather, ask, "How am I that stupid?!"

So here's one. Right after Peter confesses Jesus as the Christ and is commended by Christ, Jesus tells His disciples he must go, suffer, and die. Peter responds, "No, Lord!" Consider that statement for a minute. How many times have you passed right by it? "No, Lord!" is the ultimate in oxymorons! You don't say, "No," to your "Lord!" If Jesus is your Lord, you cannot say "No!"

In applying the R.C. Sproul, Jr Principle of Hermeneutics, I need to ask myself how I have done that. The answer is frightening.

How often do I do something I know wouldn't be pleasing to my Lord? How often do I not do something I know would be pleasing to Him? How often do I neglect Him and His Word? How often do I read something in His Word and then refuse to believe it or refuse to believe it applies to me? How often do I not change the way I live when I see a principle in my Lord's Word that would require me to do so? How often....

Sobering, isn't it?

Drives you to your knees, doesn't it? (And if it doesn't...consider going to I John and checking out the tests for the authenticity of your salvation!)

It is something that is worthy of much time in prayer and repentance. And then read your Bible! When you see your Lord commanding you to do something, to not do something, to think a certain way, to act a certain way...write it down in a notebook. Pray for the strength to do it...and then do it! A little bit every day will bring you more and more into conformity with Scripture and thus into Christ-likeness.

Oh... and listen to the sermon! This was just a small jewel from the diamond mine that Sproul brings forth!

Is He Everything?

2008-11-30T21:53:00.003-06:00

Here's a video compilation from I'll Be Honest of a sermon by Paul Washer entitled, Jesus Christ is Everything. As usual, Washer's straight-forward, in-your-face preaching strikes right to the core of his hearers. As you watch this, let the Spirit work in your heart.

Is Jesus everything to you? Really? Does your life reflect your answer?

How about your children? Do their lives reflect Christ as everything? If not, are they saved? And are you discipling them? Dad...it's YOUR job! Please don't neglect it. Please don't let past performance or sin stop you from stepping up and starting afresh. It's too important! The souls of your children are at stake!

Jesus Christ is Everything - Paul Washer from I'll Be Honest on Vimeo.

The Call to Dunkirk...For Our Children

2008-11-29T22:30:00.002-06:00

While this may be "preaching to the choir" for many who read this blog, it is still a call which can provide encouragement during those times when you are ready to throw in the towel, send the little ones off to school, and have a life like your neighbors.

Please fight through those temptations...the battle is fierce, and your children are worth every sacrifice.

(HT: Kelly at Generation Cedar)

R.C. Sproul, Jr on Worldliness

2008-11-29T12:50:00.003-06:00

For some time now, there has been a constant thread of thought that runs throughout much of what I write. It involves how our modern "witnessing" techniques typically don't produce fruit, and how a better, more Biblical witness to the world is a life that doesn't run with the world, but rather, stands apart from the world as a lamp on a hill.

Dr. R.C. Sproul, Jr. is about to publish a new book entitled, "Believing God." This book contains ninety five theses designed to spark thought-provoking conversation within churches around the country. He has samples from the book posted at his website HERE. In particular, thesis number seven eloquently discusses the life that witnesses the reality of Christ... and does so in a far better way than I ever have. Below is an excerpt from that thesis with the bold as my emphasis:

"First century Rome was a sports crazed culture. Sundry stadia still dot their ancient cities all across their empire. As Christianity spread as well, but before Christians would be dragged to these sites to become sport themselves, the Christians did not attend the Roman games. No, they did not organize a boycott in order to protest the skimpy clothing of the combatants. Nor did they carry signs outside the gatherings prophetically denouncing the violence of the games. Their reason for not attending was far more spiritual--they just didn't care. Their lives were focused on better things. This doesn't mean, of course, that the first century Christians were too austere to go to the games. The point isn't that godliness is next to crankiness. Instead their joys were too grand to be compared to having your favorite athlete win the laurel.

Christ has given us life, and life abundant. And we fill our lives with petty trifles. We think we're doing it for the lost, but are instead showing how lost we are. What the lost need from us is not that we would live lives like theirs, not that we would be consumed with the petty and insignificant. They do not need one more conversation around the water cooler about last night's episode. What they need is to see lives lived for something more important than 'Must See TV.' We do not need to learn the jargon of this subculture or that. Instead we need to live lives that speak plainly, and we need to speak plainly about our life in Christ. Better still, when we are speaking our language, at least we will hear it. If the lost are not found through our faithful lives, we are still blessed with faithful lives. 'Repent and believe the good news' is understandable in any language. Worldliness is no virtue, no matter what end we say it serves."

Ten Indictments

2008-11-09T20:00:00.004-06:00

I posted this on my RiseUpAndGetSerious blog, but it is so important I want to post it here as well.

This is a sermon from the Revival Conference 2008 in Atlanta. Pastor Paul Washer brings Ten Indictments of the American church and "nails them to the door," so to speak. It isn't your usual 30- to 40-minute "feel good" sermon. It takes time to listen.

Please do me a favor. Listen with a humble, contrite spirit. And as you listen, will you please quietly open your heart and instead of critiquing the sermon, ask God to show you where these indictments might be applicable to your life. Then in humble repentance, ask God to forgive you in the name of Jesus.

This is a sermon God could use to change the church...and I pray it would be so.

May you be blessed by the proclamation of the Word!

(If the embedded video doesn't work, click HERE to access it directly on YouTube.)

Obeying the Government

2008-11-09T19:34:00.002-06:00

In light of the recent elections, it is good to hear solid Biblical counsel on our relationship to the government.

If the embedded video does not work, click HERE to access the video directly.

Persecution or Great Awakening?

2008-11-09T19:25:00.004-06:00

This is a video clip from the Revival Conference 2008. It appears there was a panel Q&A discussion. This particular clip is Pastor Paul Washer dealing with the question of persecution.

Are you ready? Are your children ready?

This is serious, sobering stuff. We Christians in America have to quit playing games!

If the embedded video doesn't work, you can access it directly HERE. Please take the 4 minutes it takes to watch it....

Post-Election Trauma--And What to Do About It!

2008-11-09T16:45:00.013-06:00

You might be a political junkie. You might be a hard-working dad who doesn’t have time to pay much attention. You might be a stay-at-home mom, diligently raising the next generation, barely having time to catch up with the news.

And you might be a dedicated Christian who understands the liberty upon which this nation was founded, and last week’s election results have you fearing the worst for our future and for the future of your children. It is a justifiable fear, based in facts. You are frightened. You are angry. You are bitter. You are lashing out. You read much, yet it doesn’t help but to add to the fear.

I know. I am that person.

Of all that I’ve read, though, there are three articles that stand out to me.

The first is by Dan Phillips of "Biblical Christianity" blog. Dan reflects on the wholly proper Biblical example of mourning for our country in light of what has happened. Our response shouldn’t be fear, anger, or bitterness, as much as mourning and crying to the Father for mercy.

The second is a link I found on Dan’s post to Betsy Markman’s blog, “Just Another Clay Pot.” She carries the idea of mourning and grief farther, and brings out the very important point that America is not in mortal danger because of who we have elected to office, but rather, America elected these people to office because we are in mortal danger! We are no longer a nation under God.

The third is a sermon by John MacArthur that was originally preached at one of the National Day of Prayer gatherings in the spring of 2008. (The transcript and the audio are available HERE.) In this sermon, MacArthur discusses the devolution of society when God removes His hand as illustrated in Romans 1 and shows how American culture has moved significantly down that road. He Scripturally backs up the contention found in Markman’s blog that we are no longer a nation under God.

If you read these resources, you will find they are not pleasant thoughts, for they illustrate a culture that is hurtling headlong into the abyss and anyone with a Biblically informed worldview living in this culture will see the future with trepidation. How could anyone not be concerned, especially parents who see a bleak future for their children? I know the arguments about Christians having their hope in heaven, and as a believer, my ultimate hope truly is in Jesus Christ… but I still live in this world and envision how it will be turned upside down in very short order. I am still mourning as Jeremiah did.

So what to do? What would a person who trusts his life to God in Jesus Christ actually do in this case?

Maybe we ought to get more involved in politics, fighting to take back the Republican Party from the moderates! Let’s flex our political muscles as a group!

While that’s quite appealing to me in the flesh, I know it’s not going to work, for it is like a million people attempting to bail out the ocean with teaspoons. No matter how hard they bail, the water is being replenished faster. If MacArthur is correct, God has removed His hand of protection from our country and it is only a matter of time before we lose all this country once was because our culture has already changed. Nothing we do politically will work. More confirmation of that thought comes from an eye-opening book I am reading entitled, "Idols for Destruction: The Conflict of Christian Faith and American Culture" by Herbert Schlossberg. The author does a fabulous job of showing how far our culture has drifted from the authentic Christian faith. Humanism is the rule of the day, even in most of our churches, influencing and affecting most everything we do, whether we realize it or not. Many Christians aren’t even aware how much we really don’t follow a Biblical worldview, even when we say we do! The results of this election are wholly in accordance with the humanistic cultural viewpoints Schlossberg brings out in his discussion. As our culture drifts farther and farther from the remnants of our Christian heritage, we will move closer and closer to socialism, decay, and loss of freedom. While battling in the political arena may postpone the inevitable, it will not stop it from coming, for our culture has changed to the point of demanding this change occur.

Is there any good news? In a word…Yes!

This is a wake-up call to the church, not to more and greater political involvement, but to more and greater reliance upon God and His claim on our lives. We are about to have our reliance upon the material world shattered. It will be painful, but if we will turn to God now, confess our sins, conform our lives to Scriptural principles, we can minimize that pain.

Even more importantly, though, is the church that is actually being the church expands God’s Kingdom by witnessing loudly to a culture lost in darkness. This is a church where Christians aren’t just cultural, but are Biblically informed, doctrinally sound, living lives directed by God’s laws and commandments. Puritan Samuel Bolton in his book, “The True Bounds of Christian Freedom,” wrote the following: “The Law sends us to the Gospel for our justification; the Gospel sends us to the Law to frame our way of life.”

You don’t have to look very closely to see that virtually all of us “frame our way of life” according to the culture instead of according to the Law of God.

This has to change! As people who know the Lord of all, we need to frame our lives around the Word instead of around the culture. This isn’t in order to be saved, but as a result of our salvation. We need to live in Christian community, involved with each others’ lives in love. John makes it clear in his Gospel that it is by our love for each other that people will know we are Christians. Dr. R.C. Sproul, Jr. at the Highlands Study Center says it best in their mission statement: “Simple, Separate, and Deliberate.” The Christians in their churches strive for lives that are simple. That way they have time for each other, both within the individual families and between families. They are separate in that they separate from the culture, not in a monastic fashion, but in the fashion that a life lived by Biblical principles will necessarily not follow the trends, but live in a manner that seeks the approval of the Father. This necessitates a Christian culture that is distinctly separate from the pagan culture of America. And of course, to do both of these, they must be deliberate in taking all things captive to the Word of God. This makes them a light on the hill that shines forth brightly in their little corner of the world. Imagine that being recreated all across this land! Imagine how the Kingdom would be expanded through true witness and conversions! Imagine how the culture would be impacted!

How about us? We go to our Bible Studies. We talk about being salt and light, but honestly…how’s that working for ya? Have you had many converts? Has your culture changed at all? Have you personally grown in holiness and sanctification? Salt is different than the surrounding food; light is different than darkness. If we continue to look like the culture, not only will we have no hope in changing that culture, but we will go down with them as God brings His judgment.

Let’s use these perilous times to call us back to the lives our Father would have us live: lives that are humble, repentant, growing in holiness and dependence upon our God, lives that every day reflect a new aspect of obedience to the commandments of our Lord, lives that live in Christian community and express Christian love for each other. In doing so, our Lord in heaven will be pleased, and maybe, just maybe…He will show mercy to our land.

Children of the State

2008-10-29T10:17:00.008-05:00

World Magazine has a fabulous article by Joel Belz describing why we are now at the juncture in our history where we are moving toward a socialist state at a rapid pace. It has to do with having had our children indoctrinated by that very state for the past 100 years.

Some quotes from his article:

"The bells of freedom on every front traditionally ring more clearly where a biblical value system has been inculcated. No one should expect anything resembling such a result from secularist state-sponsored schools, which will naturally glorify the state. No one should be surprised when that's what happens."

and

"That's why, if I were ever forced to become a one-issue person on the political front, my single issue would be freedom of choice in education. With a nine-to-one edge in value-shaping influence, why shouldn't the government be producing products who think government-sponsored-everything is best?"

The article may be found HERE.

UPDATE:
It appears World has changed the way it does its online access. For $5 you can get access online and get two issues. Quite honestly...if you get any other news magazine, cancel it and get World! It beats the rest hands down. The beginnings of Belz's article are HERE, along with the ability to subscribe online for the $5.

SECOND UPDATE:
I found the original link to World so you can read the whole article without subscribing. It's now on both of the links above.

Fear... and an Answer

2008-10-23T01:11:00.004-05:00

I don't have a post with thoughts of my own today. Rather, I am going to point you to two links that have massive implications to your role as a dad, particularly as a "discipling dad."

The first is a 16-page "fictional" letter produced by Focus on the Family describing the potential damage to our country by coordinated, unrestrained, liberal Executive and Legislative (and subsequent Judicial) branches of our federal government. It is written from the point of view of a Christian in 2012 looking back at the damage and how it occurred. Obviously it is speculative, but it is based upon previous attempts by leftists to overturn critical parts of our constitutional liberties in favor of their "progressive" ideology. These are the sorts of things that would be conclusive evidence that God has removed His hand of protection from our nation and handed us over to judgment. This letter may be found HERE.

The second is a more profound post, written by Scott Head at his blog, "For the Generations of..." It deals with the rebuilding of society by families who turn to the authority and sufficiency of Scripture for life. Dad by dad, marriage by marriage, family by family, church by church, community by community...holy living with the whole of Scripture as a guide, the termite-infested scrap of our culture is replaced by the sweet scent of God as borne out in the lives of His godly people. This post is the answer to the fear that will undoubtedly be generated by the first link. It can be found HERE.

Christos Kurios!

Demographic Winter, Part II

2008-09-29T22:08:00.006-05:00

(Disclaimer: "The single most powerful force affecting the fate and future of society" isn't truly Demographic Winter, but is the sovereign will of the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, maker of heaven and earth!!)

Well... the video arrived in the mail today and I watched it immediately. It was by far one of the most sobering things I've ever seen. Our world has walked away from God's mandate to be fruitful and multiply, and the consequences will be staggering. Here in the United States, we can expect our GNP to begin declining within the next couple of years as the large hump of baby boomers move past their highest spending years. That will impact the stock market and the tax base. While it's virtually impossible to foresee a balanced budget now, in the very near future, it will not even be a possibility.

The video is made by secular folks, and yet they come to the conclusion that an intact family of a man and a woman and lots of kids is the only solution...and even then, it is very likely too little, too late to save society. They pointed out that the liberal ideas birthed in the 70s (feminism, homosexual marriage, cohabitation, etc) have their root in the idea that there are too many people on the planet. Those ideas are quickly discredited in the face of this impending catastrophe.

The one bright spot was when addressing the subject of whether humans are on their way to extinction. The social scientist said there were distinct groups still having large families and they would survive: Orthodox Jews, Fundamentalist Christians, and Muslims. The secular society has signed its own death warrant by rejecting the fruit of the womb for a mess of pottage. Of course, we who have (or would like to have) large families will still suffer the consequences of societal and economic breakdown of our culture.

It's quickly becoming time to "fish or cut bait" in terms of making our Christian communities real and practical.....

Demographic Winter

2008-09-25T22:51:00.004-05:00

HERE is a link to the website promoting a well-researched documentary on population decline and its consequences. This is truly frightening because it's not something that can be fixed easily or in a short amount of time. Dr. Albert Mohler, among others, has lamented on his radio show about how Europe will be Muslim within a generation or two. It's a foregone conclusion because the birthrates in all European countries have been below replacement rate for so long. They've been importing people from muslim countries to do their work...and these families have large numbers of children. Now, it's just a matter of time.

What's even more amazing is this is a secular film using secular data from secular scientists. Their conclusion? The family as defined as one man and one woman for life having lots of children is a requirement for a stable, growing, prosperous society.

Hmmmm....sort of sounds like God's idea! Marriage as defined as one man and one woman for life, being fruitful and multiplying, understanding that children are a blessing and praying for a quiver-full!!!!

Don't you love it when God is shown to have been right all along?

And don't you hate it when we as a society will suffer for having ignored Him and His laws....

Shall we do our part to receive as many of God's blessings as He deems fit to give us???

Salvation, Grace and Law

2008-09-18T11:22:00.003-05:00

Our evangelical culture has gone incredibly overboard in its emphasis on grace. This is especially evident in how many people have "prayed the prayer," call themselves "Christian," and yet show no evidence of fruit in their lives. John MacArthur recently had a four-day series on his Grace to You radio program that addressed this issue. The programs, based on the last portions of the Sermon on the Mount, can be found HERE, dated 9/2/2008-9/5/2008, entitled "Empty Words" and "Empty Hearts." I purchased his 20th anniversary edition of "The Gospel According to Jesus" and find it to be fantastic...and a very sharp critique of our "Christian" culture. (You can find a link to that book on the left.)

Another resource that I suspect will be interesting is a book by Puritan Samuel Bolton entitled, "The True Bounds of Christian Freedom." (HT: Tony at For His Glory). I intend to read this book soon! A quote that Tony point out encapsulates it well: "The Law sends us to the Gospel for justification; the Gospel sends us to the Law to frame our way of life." Wow!!!

As dads (and moms) who desire our children to walk in the way of our Lord, understanding true salvation and conversion is critical (MacArthur), and understanding the role of the Law in shaping our sanctification is crucial as well (Bolton).

Voting Vexation

2008-09-07T22:19:00.003-05:00

I just came across one of the most balanced articles on how we as Christians should be dealing with the debate on voting for or against a ticket with Sarah Palin as VP. It is found HERE and I highly commend it to you.

Africa!!!

2008-09-05T21:16:00.004-05:00

Everyone who hangs around the evangelical world long enough knows youth hang out in youth groups and those very youth groups send them out in groups to do "missions" in the summer. Some of them are supposedly "life-changing"...but most are simply excuses to hang out in some exotic places. (There are some exceptions... our church has made it clear that the youth who participate in missions are to be called and are to be prepared to serve and work hard!)

We did something different.

Instead of sending the children off with a leader and a bunch of other children, we took them with us to visit friends who are missionaries...to Africa! We lived in their home and experienced their life. We were extremely blessed by them, and were hopefully blessings and encouragements to them. They allowed us to see the culture of West African city life through their eyes and to experience it first-hand. Below are some musings about our experience:

1) While the country is officially about 95% Islamic, most seem to practice it the way most Americans practice Christianity: culturally.

2) The people take time for relationship and for community! This was probably the most encouraging thing in my mind and illustrated just what we've lost here in the States. "To Do" lists come in a distant second to spending time with people. One illustration was when Mustafa, the rent collector, came to the house. In the US, he'd probably stay outside, or maybe step just inside the door. We'd give him the check, say something about the weather, and he'd be on his way. In Africa, Mustafa came in the house and sat at the dining room table. While he was served a cold drink, he and my hosts spoke of each other's families and of the daily rolling electrical blackouts. It was a good twenty minutes before they got around to the rent check!

3) Partially because of number 2 above, things move s-l-o-w-l-y. Nothing happens at a fast pace, to include construction! It takes forever to build anything! The roads in the middle-class neighborhood were pot-holed dirt! If you have to drive somewhere, you'd best not be in a hurry. In fact, the patience of Job would be an asset!!! Another friend who had visited Africa related that a local said the following to him: "In America, you have watches and no time; in Africa we have no watches, and lots of time!" How very true.

4) We take so much for granted. The lights come on every time we throw the switch. The house is cool in the summer and warm in the winter. There is water every time you open the spigot. The mosquitoes, while the size of small birds in my part of the US, don't carry malaria. One doesn't fear the doctor here. You know when the garbage collector is going to come...and he actually picks it up himself from your particular driveway! There isn't any sewage in the streets. We don't have to filter our water before we drink it. We don't bleach our fruits and vegetables before using them. We don't have to wash feces off our eggs before bringing them home. People obey the traffic rules.

5) Our conveniences separate us from our neighbors. Air conditioned cars result in rolled up windows. Garages (especially those with electric openers) keep us from going outside. Air conditioned houses keep the windows and doors shut.

6) When you must spend time at home preparing food for the family without the benefit of modern conveniences, by necessity your family pitches in, resulting in increased closeness as well as learned responsibility.

7) When there aren't a thousand and one activities for the kids, they spend time at home with each other and with their parents. Games are played, relationships are deepened, and love is grown.

8) Being a typical monolingual American, I was frustrated at not being able to communicate with the locals...all of whom were incredibly friendly and kind.

9) A person in that country who holds hands with another of the same gender is communicating: You are my friend and I respect you! There is nothing that is sexual about it at all!!!

10) The elderly are respected and honored. We witnessed an elderly man trying unsuccessfully to cross a busy street. A strapping young man happened along and noted his situation. Without hesitation he spoke with the gentleman, let him take his arm, and led him across the street. With a word and a wave, he was on his way.

11) Ropes courses through baobab trees are a blast!!!!!!

12) Near-equator sun is extremely strong when at the beach...even on tanned, sunscreened skin!

We all got to experience the culture first-hand, with its wonders and its trials. With our hosts interpreting for us, we interacted with the locals. All in all, we had a marvelous time and bring back a very different perspective on our own culture, both its positives and the things we would like to see changed.

Now the trick is to see how we can integrate those changes into our personal lives....

Palin: Promise or Problem?

2008-09-04T13:51:00.019-05:00

It doesn't take the most astute observer of national politics to know that the nomination of Sarah Palin for the office of Vice President has Republicans and conservatives boiling over with excitement. And yet, while on one hand I'm excited as well, the other side of me questions the wisdom of electing a woman to this office. I don't have a concrete answer here, but I am going to do my best to flush out some thoughts on each side.

On the positive side:

1) Palin is probably comes the closest to a true conservative that a major party has put forward since Reagan.

2) Palin backs up her rhetoric with her life, with the most blatant being her prolife and her Second Amendment positions.

3) Palin strikes me as a politician the founders expected: a regular citizen who gets involved, and when done will return to being a regular citizen.

4) Palin is not afraid of her femininity. She actually wears skirts and doesn't screech when she speaks.

5) She has a large family and shows love and respect toward her husband!

6) Palin seems normal!

This blog is dedicated to helping advance the Biblial family as best as I can understand it. That includes the proper ordering of relationships and structure. This is where the negatives come in.

1) Scripture is crystal clear about what God desires in terms of the ordering of the family. The man is to be the covenant head with the wife being the vice-regent and helpmeet. Within the church, men are to lead as well. What is not blatant is how this should play out in the civil realm; we have to apply principles instead. There are good people who come down on both sides of this argument.

Dr. Albert Mohler, President of Southern Seminary, writes, "Do I believe that a woman can serve well in the office of Vice President of the United States? Yes. As a matter of fact, I believe that a woman could serve well as President -- and one day will. Portraits of significant men of history hang on the walls of my library --but so do portraits of Queen Elizabeth I of England and former British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher.

The New Testament clearly speaks to the complementary roles of men and women in the home and in the church, but not in roles of public responsibility. I believe that women as CEOs in the business world and as officials in government are no affront to Scripture. Then again, that presupposes that women -- and men -- have first fulfilled their responsibilities within the little commonwealth of the family.

Doug Phillips, Esq. of Vision Forum Ministries writes, "I am confident that Mrs. Palin is a delightful, sincere, thoughtful, and capable woman with many commendable virtues. But in fairness, there is nothing 'traditional' about mothers of young children becoming career moms, chief magistrates, and leading nations of three hundred million, nor is this pattern the biblical ideal to which young women should aspire. At a time when motherhood and marriage is so under attack, the message Republicans are sending is this: Winning politial elections is more important than the following proposition given by the Lord: 'That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, [to be] discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed' (Titus 2:4-5.)"

In his post, he points to an article by William Einwechter that argues in detail against women holding positions within the civil magistrate.

Dr. Voddie Baucham is one of the most eloquent when it comes to asking and answering the question about whether Palin's nomination is truly pro-family or not. He writes, "While I agree that from a political standpoint Mr. McCain made a brilliant political move, I am not so sure his pick can be portrayed as “pro-family.” It is true that Mrs. Palin is ardently pro-life –a distinction bolstered by the fact that she has five children, and chose not to abort a Down Syndrome baby—and she is also a fiscal conservative, a Washington outsider, and she hunts wolves from helicopters! What more could the Neocons ask for?

Unfortunately, Christians appear to be headed toward a hairpin turn at breakneck speed without the slightest clue as to the danger ahead. I don’t see this as a pro-family pick at all! Moreover, I believe the conservative fervor over this pick shows how politicized Christians have become at the expense of maintaining a prophetic voice. I believe that Mr. McCain has proven with his VP pick that he is pro-victory, not pro-family. In fact, I believe this was the anti-family pick."

Dr. Baucham's two posts can be found HERE and HERE (the first article really hit a note with my wife).

Lastly, Kevin Swanson, the head of the Christian Home Educators of Colorado and host of "Generations" radio show, speaks of how one of the ways God judges a nation is through raising up women in leadership positions. He points out that one of the reasons this happens is because men have failed to rise to the occasion and it is natural that women will not let things fall apart if they can help it. That is happening today in America. Women vastly outnumber men in college and in law school.

2) Palin IS a mother of five children and like it or not, there IS a difference between men and women. These children need a mother who will be at home to nurture them. Without casting stones, one must wonder if she would be on the road to being a grandmother right now if she had been at home instead of in the governor's office. This argument has been used hypocritically by the liberals, but is a legitimate question when asked by pro-family people.

3) Her description of herself as "used to be a hockey mom" indicates that motherhood is the low rung on the totem pole and that while motherhood is great, girls and young women should aspire to "more."

4) Her example will lead many young women to aspire to life outside of the home, leaving more and more children to day-care and government education.

So what to do?

It was very easy to vote against a woman when that woman is Hillary in her pant-suit, screeching socialist platitudes. But now we are presented with a woman with bona fide conservative credentials who could most likely lead this country well.

I respect Albert Mohler in many ways, but I'm not sure he is right in this case. Proverbs 31 illustrates a woman who enables her husband to sit in the gates (the government) and praise her there. While she certainly is involved in a lot of things outside the home, her focus is the home and she doesn't sit in the gates!

Voddie Baucham's articles really hit home with me, but I think Kevin Swanson's conclusions most illustrate reality.

God IS judging this country in many ways. In this issue specifically, look at the rise of women in political power. Number three in the line of succession for the presidency is a woman, and if McCain wins, number two will be as well. It's entirely possible there will be two women running for president in 2012 (Hillary and Palin). There are more and more women in elected office. This is not going to stop until Christian men stand up and start leading their households and start leading their churches. In the mean time, we have what we have. Could we do worse than having someone like Sarah Palin in office? Absolutely!

Terry at Ornaments of Grace writes HERE and HERE about recognizing that although the best way for a family to be structured is for the wife/mom to be oriented toward home, for the Palin family, they have made their choice and "that train has already left the station".

I wish I had a solid conclusion.

I can't change how the Palins are doing things in their family. I can be pleased that if we have to have a woman at the highest levels of government, that she is someone with the conservative credentials of Sarah Palin.

And yet, as a dad of daughters, I resent the unspoken message that being a keeper at home is mundane and not something to which they should aspire. I resent the unspoken message that being a helpmeet to a husband and a rock on which he leans is only an option for a woman (and not the best one at that).

And of course, as much as I despise being put in a position of voting against someone, Barak Obama is about the most evil (yes, I use that term intentionally and not rhetorically) candidate put forward in my memory. His positions on abortion are horrifying and his stated policies are Marxist to the core.

Is a vote for McCain (and thus Palin) in order to attempt to thwart the evil that is Obama just being pragmatic? Maybe... but I do know that having someone with her conservative principles makes McCain much more palatable than he would have been otherwise.....

Sorry if you were looking for a definitive answer from this post, but I hope that it and the links herein help in your own thoughts as you grapple with this decision.

Single-Issue Voting

2008-08-26T21:12:00.002-05:00

It's obviously that time of year again! The national elections are just around the corner.

Many people who call themselves "Pro-life" are often subjected to the accusation of being "single-issue voters"... as if that was a bad thing. If you are truly making a decision to vote FOR a candidate based on a single issue along, it certainly IS a bad thing. But if you are disqualifying a candidate because of a single issue that is important to you, then it is a GOOD thing.

In 1995, John Piper published a wonderful article discussing this very issue. It is as valid today as it was then and I would commend it to you HERE.

She Met Her Prince

2008-05-23T00:27:00.004-05:00

One has no idea how long God has deemed their life on this earth to last. For some, it will be 80 years or more; for others, a mere five. That was the case for little Maria Chapman, the youngest adopted daughter of Steven Curtis Chapman.

Ted Slater at BoundlessLine said it better than I can:

"Oh I will dance with Cinderella

I don't wanna miss even one song,

Cuz all too soon the clock will strike midnight

And she'll be gone

And sometimes, for reasons beyond our understanding, she's gone before the clock strikes midnight.

Last night, as many of you already know, CCM artist Steven Curtis Chapman's youngest daughter, Maria Sue, left us. Unexpectedly, the Prince tapped her papa on the shoulder and gently whispered, "May I have this dance?"

I can imagine the joy in Maria's eyes when she at last met her new Partner, when Jesus took her in His arms and spun her around the Ballroom, and as He shows her around the Castle, her new home.

May Maria's new dancing partner, the Prince of Peace, bring peace to the broken hearts of those who miss dear little Maria. And may we cherish our dances with the ones we love, while they're still with us."

The song lyrics at the beginning of Ted's post are from a song Chapman wrote for his two youngest daughters. The video is below. When you are finished viewing it, please take whatever time it takes to have your family pray for the Chapmans, and then to have a dance with each of your "Cinderellas." Hold them tight, and dance as if it were the last dance on this earth.... They deserve it, Dads!!!

100% Profanity Free!

2008-04-01T09:33:00.001-05:00

I guess I'm happy the results of this widget returned as they did!!!

Created by OnePlusYou

Peer-Dependent or God-Dependent?

2008-03-20T12:09:00.008-05:00

The premise of much of what I write is that responsible, Christian parents are mandated by God to disciple their children so they grow to be godly adults and do the same for their children. This concept is referred to in other places as a vision for multigenerational faithfulness...the looking beyond just one generation to what your influence as a parent can be several generations hence.

With that in mind, I just have a few observations about today's youth culture...which in turn, begs the question of why we would send our children to that culture if we are looking out not only for their future, but for the future of many generations.

Probably the biggest issue at hand is that of peer-dependency. Peer-dependency is the overwhelming need for peers and for acceptance by those peers. This means a child will do and accept whatever is necessary in order to gain approval by the group of peers. It takes very little time to realize that children from as young as nine or ten years old are being overcome by peer-dependency.

Peer-dependency is fostered by the evolutionary concept that children should be separated by age in a group school. (People who wonder about "socialization" of children who are educated at home never stop to consider whether their own children being "socialized" by same-aged peers is really normal or best.) I have had experience with a couple of young people intentionally taken from the group school in order to try to arrest the bad influence in their lives.

One of these young people was a twelve-year-old girl. She was devastated, not because she was missing her family, but because she couldn't stand to be away from her peers. She wailed in a fit of despondency, "I have to have my friends; I can't live without my friends!" She was so dependent upon her "friends" she could not even conceive of a life where she could be discipled and grow into a mature young adult. Her only concept was of the here and now...which meant being a mall-rat with her "friends."

Another of these young people was a sixteen-year-old boy. He, too, couldn't imagine life outside of the teen culture. He considered himself and his fellow teens to be the fount of all wisdom, while adults didn't have a clue as to real life, a life that mostly revolved around text-messaging, Facebook, and vile rap music. Again, the concept of looking forward and desiring to grow into an adult was completely missing. The only vision was an angry one of the here and now...and with what was deemed "cool" by his "friends."

Peer-dependency drags these children down by convincing them the only thing that matters is acceptance by peers. In order to be accepted by peers, you have to be identical to the peers, in dress, in speech, in music, in knowledge of pop culture, etc. You have no identity of your own, and the identity you create is that of the lowest common denominator. "Cool" is defining. Today is all that matters. The thought of this period of life being a training ground for adulthood is despised.

The funny thing is that adult culture seems to think this is normal and something to be expected, when the reality is it is something we have created by the methodology we use in raising the children. We place them in age-segregated institutions early in life where they find acceptance only in how much they are like their peers. We communicate how we expect rebellion in the teen years. We let others, to include television and music, become the primary influences in their lives. And then we hope they will grow out of it and become successful some day. Instead we find they never grow up.

So what does one do? Ideally you develop a long-term picture for how to raise your children while they are still young and you have many years with which to work. It is certainly more difficult to change things once they are in the clutches of their peers, but it can be done.

First and foremost is a vision. You must have a vision for their lives and you must communicate it to them so they internalize it. If they have a vision and goal for what kind of person they want to be and for what kind of life they want to live, they will reject the narcissistic, futureless lifestyle of the typical young person.

Secondly, you must not place them in a situation where the peers drag them down...which means you must educate them at home. If you place them in an age-segregated group classroom, it is only a matter of time before the pressure to conform grasps them in its clutches.

Thirdly, you as the parent need to help them grow in godliness by modeling it yourself, and by teaching them to walk according to the ways laid down by God in His Word.

Fourthly, you as the parent need to watch them carefully in order to discern the "bent" God has given them and then help them grow in that "bent" as best as possible. Avoid the temptation to define them according to how the culture defines "successful." Instead, define them according to God's Word and according to their particular, God-given strengths.

Teen culture and pop culture in today's America is a vile thing, desiring to tear down everything you hold dear. As parents who desire the best for our children and who desire generations of God-fearing progeny, we must do our level best to protect our children from that culture and to instill in them a massive vision for a glorious, joy-filled future as servants of the Living Savior, Christ Jesus. Only then will they be able to stand up to the lion crouching at the door desiring to devour them....

Ominous Trends....

2008-03-13T18:58:00.001-05:00

Al Mohler summarizes some frightening developments and attitudes that are coming out regarding the right of parents to determine their own children's education. Note in particular the quote from the NEA at the end of the article: that we should leave the shaping of children's minds, careers, and futures to trained professionals! My goodness! What ever did society do before there were trained professionals around to raise the children or to tell parents how to raise their children?!! And note carefully they didn't say anything about actual academics...it's the minds and futures and careers of the children they desire to influence.

The article can be found HERE.

What is Education's Purpose?

2008-03-07T20:18:00.008-06:00

"'A primary purpose of the educational system is to train school children in good citizenship, patriotism and loyalty to the state and the nation as a means of protecting the public welfare,' the judge wrote, quoting from a 1961 case on a similar issue."(Emphasis added and quoted from the San Francisco Chronicle)

I guess the purpose of education in America is finally out in the open. How many parents in this nation who regularly put little Johnny and little Jenny on the yellow school bus in the morning realize the primary function of the school they are sending their precious little ones to is to train them in "good citizenship, partriotism and loyalty to the state and the nation?" And all along we thought it was to teach them readin', writin', and 'rithmatic! If this is truly the aim of our education system, then it makes sense that our children are falling farther and farther behind in actual academic subjects!

This quote is from an article in the San Francisco Chronicle regarding the recent court case that has effectively outlawed homeschooling in the state of California by requiring anyone (including parents) who teach parents to be "certified." Certified to do what? To teach the child to read? To teach him to write? To teach him arithmetic? Obviously not. Certification means the teacher's primary function is to indoctrinate their little minds with whatever attitudes and ideas the state deems proper and appropriate.

This ought to frighten all parents, not just those who choose to educate their children at home for it is an in-your-face admission that the state believes it knows better than you on how to best raise your child. As a former military officer, I have no problem with patriotism and loyalty to one's nation. I raise my children to be patriotic and to love their nation (especially with regard to its founding ideals), but also to have a very healthy skepticism regarding government and its ever-increasing lust for power.

My children also know what statism is...and the indoctrination of children by the state under the guise of "good citizenship" and "loyalty to the state and the nation" is just that. Why, when I hear phrases like that used, especially in regard to our children, do the hauntings of Nazi Germany rise up in my mind?????

Liberty is rapidly being snatched away from us, right from underneath our very eyes.

So let's look at the situation in California in particular, for it is where this is playing out most dramatically.

Recently the legislature passed and Governor Arnold signed into law a bill that requires that homosexuality be treated as normal, acceptable, and on par with heterosexuality in all schools. There can be no bias against it and therefore, even phrases like "mom and dad" could be removed from school textbooks. Kindergartners would be hit with homosexual indoctrination through the use of homosexual-friendly stories and programs. Combine this with another California court's decision that parental rights end at the school bus door and it's a nightmare scenario for any parent who still believes in moral decency, but even more so for the Bible-believing Christian who desires to raise his children in the fear and admonition of the Lord. This bill alone has got to have thousands of public school families thinking hard about removing their children from the public school classrooms in order to disciple them at home.

Now comes this edict from our black-robed masters that prevents parents from removing their children. It can't be any clearer! The state wants our children and they want to control exactly what goes into their minds and thus what directs their thoughts. One of the foundations of liberty is the ability of parents to raise their children as they see fit, and that would include all aspects of education. This edict says otherwise and it is nothing short of totalitarianism coming to our republic.

Please... do not ignore this because you don't happen to live in California. If it happens there, it is only a matter of time before it spreads. Educate yourself on the situation and its implications. I have provided three links (two audio and one written) that will spell it out for you. After you have educated yourself, then take action. The simplest is to click on the last link below and sign the Home School Legal Defense Association's petition to the California Supreme Court. You don't have to be an HSLDA member to sign the petition. There needs to be an overwhelming tidal wave of anger that rises against this in order for the judges on that court to feel the pressure necessary to stop it. Please don't think that your voice isn't necessary.

Focus on the Family Broadcast

CrossTalk America (Broadcast dated March 7, 2008)

Dr. R. Albert Mohler, President of Southern Seminary

HSLDA Petition to the California Supreme Court (Please click over and sign it!!!)

A Vision for Home Discipling

2008-03-01T04:58:00.009-06:00

You don't have to read very far in this blog to see that I am an advocate of discipling your children at home and believe it is God's call on the Christian to do so. Whenever I run across people considering bringing their children home (or never sending them out in the first place), they always have similar questions, usually having to do with which curriculum they should use. This is because, although they know there is something wrong with sending their children away, they are coming from a paradigm in which they had been "educated" in an age-segregated, scope-and-sequence-driven classroom and thus think the curriculum is the most important component of what they are considering doing.

My advice to them is they absolutely MUST get the big picture before starting, for if they simply try to reproduce "school at home," they will burn out. They MUST determine what the goal is at the end of their endeavors and work backwards to determine what they should be doing now. This goal should be saturated in Bible, and they should carefully examine their own attitudes and ideas for cultural assumptions that aren't in line with Biblical principles. That's the hard part because of the paradigm blinders each of us has.

Here are my recommendations for three books to help you do that. In my humble opinion, these should be required reading for all parents looking to disciple/educate their children at home, for they help tremendously with developing an unshakable conviction for why you are doing what you do and what you are aiming for at the end. One warning though... I heard Dr. Voddie Baucham interviewed on Family Life Today with Dennis Rainey, and he was repeatedly referred to as someone who will "rock your boat." Anyone who's been in a rocking boat knows it sometimes makes you a bit ill. These books WILL cause you to examine your closely held beliefs and paradigms and will thus "rock your boat." Sometimes that is exciting; sometimes it's uncomfortable. But either way, your children will be the ultimate beneficiaries.

Enjoy!

The first, and in my opinion, the most important, is When You Rise Up by Dr. R.C. Sproul, Jr. While it is available through Amazon (use the book list on the left), it is also available through his ministry website HERE.

Unfortunately the third book isn't available at Amazon. It is Upgrade by Kevin Swanson, a second-generation homeschooler who is the head of Christian Home Educators of Colorado (CHEC). Swanson's book can be purchased directly through CHEC at the link HERE.

I'm Still Here!

2008-02-22T22:14:00.003-06:00

For those who check by my blog regularly and are wondering if I fell off the edge of the earth... I didn't; but have been quite busy. A bit of writer's block hasn't helped, either.

I did just post a quick thought picked up from a wonderful book I read this week entitled, "The Heavenly Man." It's the life story of Brother Yun of China. This post is on my other blog and can be accessed by clicking HERE.

Enjoy!

A Church-Based Hope for Adultolescents

2007-11-18T18:12:00.000-06:00

John Piper wrote a great piece in Bethlehem's newsletter last week. It is entitled, "A Church-Based Hope for Adultescents" and can be accessed HERE.

Following on the heals of Alex and Brett Harris, Al Mohler, and others, Piper hits the nail squarely on the head in decrying the rise of the young adult who refuses to grow up. He then adds concrete, useful thoughts on the response of the church.

You can read the text here if you don't want to use the link above:

A Church-Based Hope for “Adultolescents”

By John PiperNovember 13, 2007

Christian Smith, professor of sociology at Notre Dame, wrote in the most recent Books and Culture a revie w of six books that deal with the new phenomenon of “adultolescence”—that is, the postponement of adulthood into the thirties. I want to relate this phenomenon to the church. But first here is a summary from Smith’s article of what it is and how it came about.

What Is Adultolescence?

Smith writes,

“Teenager” and “adolescence” as representing a distinct stage of life were very much 20th-century inventions, brought into being by changes in mass education, child labor laws, urbanization and suburbanization, mass consumerism, and the media. Similarly, a new, distinct, and important stage in life, situated between the teenage years and full-fledged adulthood, has emerged in our culture in recent decades—reshaping the meaning of self, youth, relationships, and life commitments as well as a variety of behaviors and dispositions among the young.
What has emerged from this new situation has been variously labeled “extended adolescence,” “youthhood,” “adultolescence,” “young adulthood,” the “twenty-somethings,” and “emerging adulthood.”

One way of describing this group is to highlight the tendency to delay adulthood or stay in the youth mindset longer than we used to. Smith suggests the following causes for this delay in arriving at mature, responsible adulthood.

First is the growth of higher education. The GI Bill, changes in the American economy, and government subsidizing of community colleges and state universities led in the second half of the last century to a dramatic rise in the number of high school graduates going on to college and university. More recently, many feel pressured—in pursuit of the American dream—to add years of graduate school education on top of their bachelor’s degree. As a result, a huge proportion of American youth are no longer stopping school and beginning stable careers at age 18 but are extending their formal schooling well into their twenties. And those who are aiming to join America's professional and knowledge classes—those who most powerfully shape our culture and society—are continuing in graduate and professional school programs often up until their thirties.
A second and related social change crucial to the rise of emerging adulthood is the delay of marriage by American youth over the last decades. Between 1950 and 2000, the median age of first marriage for women rose from 20 to 25 years old. For men during that same time the median age rose from 22 to 27 years old. The sharpest increase for both took place after 1970. Half a century ago, many young people were anxious to get out of high school, marry, settle down, have children, and start a long-term career. But many youth today, especially but not exclusively men, face almost a decade between high school graduation and marriage to spend exploring life's many options in unprecedented freedom.
A third major social transformation contributing to the rise of emerging adulthood as a distinct life phase concerns changes in the American and global economy that undermine stable, lifelong careers and replace them instead with careers of lower security, more frequent job changes, and an ongoing need for new training and education. Most young people today know they need to approach their careers with a variety of skills, maximal flexibility, and readiness to re tool as needed. That itself pushes youth toward extended schooling, delay of marriage, and, arguably, a general psychological orientation of maximizing options and postponing commitments.
Finally, and in part as a response to all of the above, parents of today’s youth, aware of the resources often required to succeed, seem increasingly willing to extend financial and other support to their children, well into their twenties and even into their early thirties.

The characteristics of the 18-30 year-olds that these four factors produce include:

(1) identity exploration, (2) instability, (3) focus on self, (4) feeling in limbo, in transition, in-between, and (5) sense of possibilities, opportunities, and unparalleled hope. These, of course, are also often accompanied by big doses of transience, confusion, anxiety, self-obsession, melodrama, conflict, and disappointment.

How Should the Church Respond?

How might the church respond to this phenomenon in our culture? Here are my suggestions.

1. The church will encourage maturity, not the opposite. “Do not be children in your thinking. Be infants in evil, but in your thinking be mature” (1 Corinthians 4:20).

2. The church will press the fact that maturity is not a function of being out of school but is possible to develop while in school.

3. While celebrating the call to life long singleness, the church will not encourage those who don’t have the cal to wait till late in their twenties or thirties to marry, even if it means marrying while in school.

4. The church will foster flexibility in life through living by faith and resist the notion that learning to be professionally flexible must happen through a decade of experimentation.

5. The church will help parents prepare their youth for independent financial living by age 22 or sooner, where disabilities do not prevent.

6. The church will provide a stability and steadiness in life for young adults who find a significant identity there.

7. The church will provide inspiring, worldview-forming teaching week in and week out that will deepen the mature mind.

8. The church will provide a web of serious, maturing relationships.

9. The church will be a corporate communion of believers with God in his word and his ordinances that provide a regular experience of universal significance.

10. The church will be a beacon of truth that helps young adults keep their bearings in the uncertainties of cultural fog and riptides.

11. The church will regularly sound the trumpet for young adults that Christ is Lord of their lives and that they are not dependent on mom and dad for ultimate guidance.

12. The church will provide leadership and service roles that call for the responsibility of maturity in the young adults who fill them.

13. The church will continually clarify and encourage a God-centered perspective on college and grad school and career development.

14. The church will lift up the incentives and values of chaste and holy singleness, as well as faithful and holy marriage.

15. The church will relentlessly extol the maturing and strengthening effects of the only infallible life charter for young adults, the Bible.

In these ways, I pray that the Lord Jesus, through his church, will nurture a provocative and compelling cultural alternative among our “emerging adults.” This counter-cultural band will have more stability, clearer identity, deeper wisdom, Christ-dependent flexibility, an orientation on the good of others not just themselves, a readiness to bear responsibility and not just demand rights, an expectation that they will suffer without returning evil for evil, an awareness that life is short and after that comes judgment, and a bent to defer gratification till heaven if necessary so as to do maximum good and not forfeit final joy in God.

Seeking to serve the next generation,

Pastor John

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Please include the following statement on any distributed copy: By John Piper. © Desiring God. Website: desiringGod.org

Romans 1 and Poll Results

2007-11-17T22:12:00.000-06:00

I was listening recently to a sermon by Tim Conway regarding the decision of how to educate your child (click HERE for the link)... public, private, or home. He does a very nice job articulating Scripture and the principles therein as he encourages his listeners to apply the Bible in this area.

One of the principles he brings out is directly out of Romans 1. God has given man no excuse for not knowing him, yet man refuses. They do not honor Him or give thanks to Him. Instead they became futile in their thinking and although claiming to be wise, were in reality fools. This is a perfect example of what is going on in the public school system and in many private schools as well. While they may not explicitly challenge God, they simply ignore Him. Note what God says of His judgment upon such people (beginning in verse 26): they are given up to dishonorable passions, to debased minds to do what ought not to be done.

Shortly after listening to this sermon, I read in our local papers about a comprehensive survey of the students of all the public colleges in Minnesota. One fact in particular stood out. The students were asked if they had had sexual relations in the past. Then they were asked if they had had sexual relations in the past twelve months. The results were frightening. The percentage answering "yes" to the first question was slightly more than 78%! That's almost four in five of all students in the college! The percentage answering "yes" to the second question was not much better... 72%! So almost three in four college students have been involved in fornication in the past twelve months alone!

Is there any question that these students and their professors have been given over to the dishonorable passions of a debased mind? Is there any question God has brought his judgment upon these schools based upon Romans 1? And is there any question the public secondary schools aren't very far behind. As long as God is ignored in these institutions, He will bring His judgment upon them.

As those entrusted with the lives of precious children created in the image of God, do we honestly do our best to care for their souls by sending them to places where God's judgment is so readily apparent?

I think not....

Michael Billings...the Day After

2007-11-09T07:26:00.001-06:00

The earthly remains of Michael Billings were laid to rest yesterday. I did not know him, but I had the pleasure of seeing him work during several Vision Forum events. Like all of the interns of the time, he was a remarkable young man.

Doug Phillips has posted many tributes and remembrances to Michael, all from men of Godly stature. Please take some time and read them, both to honor Michael, but also to consider what would be written about you or about your own son if the Lord were to call today. If you don't like what comes to mind, then make the change. Do the hard things. Follow Jesus with all your heart, conforming your life to His Word.

HERE'S the link to Doug's blog. It is the generic link, so depending on when you click on it, you won't necessarily go straight to the tributes to Michael. They are dated November 9, 2007 and earlier.

A Young Man...

2007-11-06T18:38:00.000-06:00

Sometimes it's hard to get a picture of what we want as an end result for our parenting. Sure, we have glimpses here and there and may have some parts in focus. But what kind of young person do we really hope to launch into the world...and for this post, what kind of young MAN do we as parents wish to launch?

Here is an example to follow. This young man at age 18 is more mature than most 30-year-olds, and knows what really matters in life. Those with daughters should dream of this type of young man for future sons-in-law.

His name is Michael Billings...and he is now in the presence of his Savior as the result of a car accident last Sunday evening.

Please take a moment to click over to Doug Phillips' blog and read Doug's tribute to this remarkable young man. Be sure to take the 7-8 minutes to hear Michael's sermon to his fellow interns...Doug has it available at the end of his tribute. When you recognize this sermon was delivered by a young man who was 17 at the time, it makes you tremble at the state of most of the young men in our country, and yet have hope because there ARE such men as Michael out there.

May he be resting in the bosom of his Savior, and may that same Savior, Jesus Christ, bring comfort and peace to his family and friends during their time of loss.

HERE'S the link to the tribute.

Strength, Wisdom...and Pride

2007-11-01T20:20:00.000-05:00

I was blessed enough to be able to attend a retreat this last weekend where Gregg Harris was the keynote speaker. In one of his presentations, he discussed the concept of a "Rebelutionary" household. Of course, this is based on his twin sons' ministry to young adults, "The Rebelution." While Alex and Brett are calling their generation to rebel against low expectations, Gregg is calling on the parents of that generation...and Dad in particular...to create a household that enables this rebellion for the glory of God!

Gregg pointed out that Scripture often refers to young adults as having strength. It also often refers to older adults as having wisdom. It never combines the two; young adults are not commended for their wisdom nor are older adults commended for their strength. This is one of the causes of the social pathologies of today. Young men are full of strength with no wisdom available to tell them how to use it!

Gregg suggests a partnership: Young adults with their strength partnering with older adults with their wisdom. Together, they can do amazing things. I find that concept quite exciting.

But there's a problem.

In today's world, our children are being bombarded on all sides with "self-esteem." As a result, we have a generation that thinks quite highly of themselves, and believes they are already the repository of all wisdom. They have no clue that "foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child." I am reading another book by J.C. Ryle on the topic of thoughts for young men. Ryle lived in the mid-1800s...but his admonitions are every bit as applicable today as they were over a century ago. His first admonition is against the sin of pride, and he specifically targets the pride of a young man that says he knows more than his elders, and therefore has nothing to learn or gain from them. This is obviously folly...and it's obviously still true today, if not more so. As a result, this generation of young adults doesn't believe they need the wisdom of older adults. Pride condemns any hope of a partnership with parents.

How then, do we then implement this partnership?

It will require efforts and grace on both sides. First... the parents must create an environment where life with them is an adventure, specifically an adventure in Christian love and service. They must have a stated vision, a goal...and the children and young adults must be major players in that vision. Secondly... the young adult must humble himself to the point of understanding he does NOT have the wisdom necessary to be effective in our world, and that his parents do! If he will humble himself and place himself under the authority of his parents as Scripture admonishes him to do, and the parents are actively seeking to partner with him and his strength... great things will happen! The Kingdom will be advanced. The young adult will grow in wisdom and knowledge and character. He will be launched off the shoulders of his parents and will then be in a place to launch the next generation off of his shoulders to points far higher than anyone in the parents' generation could have imagined.

This is a great vision. This is a great thing to apply to your family. This draws families close, while placing their focus on loving their neighbor in the name of the Lord. This will be Christianity applied! But it requires vision and humbleness...both of which God will give if you ask.

May God receive the glory.

The Myth of Adolescence

2007-10-07T20:51:00.000-05:00

Brett and Alex Harris have been making huge waves in the young adult community for several years now by promoting their message of "Rebelution" by encouraging young people to "Do hard things." They have a very distinct and unique message that is sorely needed by the next generation. One of the underlying theses of their message is that of the myth of adolescence. Alex Harris writes a great article that is posted both at their Rebelution blog and reprinted in Randy Alcorn's Eternal Perspective Ministries newsletter (where I read it). Randy says of the twins, "Alex and Brett Harris are the real deal- young men of character, depth, and eternal perspective. They're abandoned to Jesus. Their message is vital, for just such a time as this. Join the rebelution!"

I am taking the liberty of bringing Alex's article here, where it fits in so well with the message of this blog.

Enjoy...learn...and apply!

The Myth of Adolescence
by Alex Harris

The trained elephant of India is a perfect picture of the power of psychological captivity. Tamed and utilized for its enormous strength, the great beast stands nearly 10 feet tall and weighs up to 5 tons when fully grown. Its tasks may include uprooting full-grown trees, hauling great boulders, and carrying enormous loads on its shoulders. And yet, when the day's work is done and this powerful beast must be kept from wandering off during the night, its owner simply takes a piece of twine, attaches it to a small branch embedded in the ground, and ties it around the elephant's right hind leg. Reason dictates that the elephant can easily snap the twine or pull the twig from the ground, and yet the owner does not worry, fully confident that when morning comes he will find the animal exactly where he left him. And he does.

I'll admit that upon first hearing of this practice, I couldn't decide which was harder to believe: that the owner was confident, or that his confidence proved justified. A beast that can uproot trees is suddenly unable to pull up a twig? What is it about the piece of twine and the small branch that allows them to subdue all of the elephant's power? I soon discovered that it had little to do with the twine around the elephant's ankle, and everything to do with invisible shackles around its mind.

My contention is simple: The young adults of our generation are the elephant. Our twine is the 20th century concept of adolescence. Our twig is societal expectations. We stand restrained as a hurting world burns around us. Yet our twine and twig are of a recent origin. Young adults of the past were not so encumbered.

David Farragut, the U. S. Navy's first admiral, became a midshipman on the warship Essex at the age of 10. At the age of 12, a mere boy by modern standards, Farragut was given command of his first ship, sailing a captured vessel, crew, and prisoners, back to the U. S. after a successful battle. Young David was given responsibility at an early age, and he rose to the occasion.

The father of our country, George Washington, though never thought to be particularly bright by his peers, began to master geometry, trigonometry, and surveying when he would have been a 5th or 6th grader in our day and ceased his formal education at 14 years of age. At the age of 16 he was named official surveyor for Culpepper County, Virginia. For the next three years, Washington earned nearly $100,000 a year (in modern purchasing power). By the age of 21, he had leveraged his knowledge of the surrounding land, along with his income, to acquire 2,300 acres of prime Virginia land.

These examples astound us in our day and age, but this is because we view life through an extra social category called 'adolescence', a category that would have been completely foreign to men and women just 100 years ago. Prior to the late 1800s there were only 3 categories of age: childhood, adulthood, and old age. It was only with the coming of the early labor movement with its progressive child labor laws, coupled with new compulsory schooling laws, that a new category, called adolescence, was invented. Coined by G. Stanley Hall, who is often considered the father of American psychology, 'adolescence' identified the artificial zone between childhood and adulthood when young people ceased to be children, but were no longer permitted by law to assume the normal responsibilities of adulthood, such as entering into a trade or finding gainful employment. Consequently, marriage and family had to be delayed as well, and so we invented 'the teenager', an unfortunate creature who had all the yearnings and capabilities of an adult, but none of the freedoms or responsibilities.

Teenage life became a 4-year sentence of continuing primary education and relative idleness known as 'high school' (four years of schooling which would later be repeated in the first two years of college). Abolished by law were the young Farraguts and young Washingtons, who couldn't spare the time to be children any longer than necessary. Cultivated instead was the culture we know today, where young people are allowed, encouraged, and even forced to remain quasi-children for much longer than necessary.

The effect of this seismic shift in America's philosophy of education is not limited to students in the public schools. As homeschoolers we may feel as though we have escaped the danger, but an honest evaluation proves that, as a whole, we also fall short of realizing our potential. After reading the examples of great men of our country's past, we should recognize that there is no reason why a 13 to 18 year old cannot behave as a responsible adult. History proves it is possible. Diverse cultures confirm its validity. The only thing holding young people back in America today is the twine of this perpetual recess called adolescence and the twig of lowered social expectations. We expect immaturity and irresponsibility, from ourselves and from one another, and that is exactly what we get.

I wrote of the great elephants of India, who, although they have the physical capacity to uproot trees during the day, can be restrained all night long by a piece of twine and a twig. How is this possible?

The elephant's training begins when it is still young and considerably less powerful. Removed from its mother, the elephant is then shackled with an iron chain to a large tree. For days and weeks on end, the baby elephant strains against its restraints, only to find that all exertion is useless. Then slowly, over a period of several weeks, sometimes months, smaller chains and smaller trees are used. Eventually, you can use a piece of twine and a small branch, and the great beast will not budge. Its mind is fully committed to the idea that it cannot go anywhere when there is something around its right hind leg.

And so I ask my generation, individually and corporately, "What is holding us back?" History demonstrates that we are far more capable than we think we are. Our failure to realize substantial achievement at early ages is due, not to any innate inadequacies on our part, but rather to our social conditioning. American society, with its media-saturated youth culture, not only follows trends and fads, but it creates them. Classrooms, TV shows, magazines, and websites are not only addressing us at the level of social expectations, but they are in fact dictating those expectations. They tell us how to act, think, and talk; they tell us what to wear, what to buy, and where to buy it; they tell us what to dream, what to value, and what to hate. We are being squeezed into a mold where there is no room for Christian character or competence. And as the famous proverb goes, "As the twig is bent, so grows the tree."

In what could be considered the most maddening aspect of this crisis, not all areas of maturity are being stunted. In a powerful demonstration of teenagers' ability to meet the expectations set before them, we witness young people today reaching unprecedented levels of technological proficiency and sexual experience. It is ironic that many teenagers, while fluent in multiple computer languages, are not expected to carry on an intelligent conversation with an adult. It is heartbreaking that so many young girls, while constantly pressed to become more and more sexually alluring, are not expected to attain any notable level of character beneath the surface.

Our world cannot last another generation of Christian young people who fit in. The shackles of society are on our minds and hearts, not our ankles. We are held back only by the myth of adolescence and the lies of social expectations. If we would only recognize that our restraints are illusory, and then let God's Word and all of history govern our sense of what we are capable of, we would be a force this world could no longer ignore.

We face a crisis and an opportunity. A crisis, in the sense that we can no longer afford to slowly drift towards adulthood, viewing the teen years as a vacation from responsibility, and an opportunity, in the sense that we can embrace life now and make a difference for the glory of God, and for the good of our family, our nation, and our world. Look down at your "ankle" and see the pathetic contrivance that has been restraining you. Now renew your mind in the light of God's Word and take a step forward.

BURNOUT!!!!

2007-09-29T23:17:00.000-05:00

So let's say you have taken the responsibility to disciple your children to heart. Let's say you are home-educating them.

And let's say you are burning out or have already burned out...you are ready to throw in the towel.

Why? How could that be? Aren't you doing what you are called by God to do?

(Note: The principle I'm about to discuss applies to all types of burnout, not just that of home-educating moms and dads.)

I had the privilege of attending the Desiring God National Conference entitled, "Stand" last night. The first speaker was John MacArthur (Sermon summary and link to listen HERE). One of his points on being a person who perseveres involved burnout. He noted that burnout is not the result of hard work. A ditch digger does extremely hard labor, yet he doesn't "burnout." Rather, burnout is the result of discouragement...and discouragement is the result of unmet expectations. That alone is profound, but even more so was his conclusion that man as a sinner is not owed a single thing. Each and every thing we have, from the next beat of our heart to our home to our children to our job...all of it is the result of the mercy of God.

Before you read on, go back and read that last part again. Consider it. Dwell upon it.

Burnout is the result of discouragement.
Discouragement is the result of unmet expectations.
All we have is the result of the mercy of God.

How does this fit you in your life right now?

(The rest is my musings on his point)

When we finally bring into focus that everything in our world is a merciful gift from God rather than something owed to us, we finally get our expectations correct. In other words, we no longer expect anything, but rather focus on the thankfulness for the mercies God has extended in our lives to this point. As a result, we cannot have unmet expectations. If we don't have unmet expectations, we don't have discouragement. And if we don't have discouragement, we don't have burnout.

How does this apply to the home-educating parent (usually moms)? Do I really mean you are to have no expectations of your children when you home-educate? No. What I mean is to realize your children are merciful gifts from God, your ability to be home with them is a merciful gift from God, your desire to raise them in the fear and admonition of the Lord is a merciful gift from God, your child's individual personality, talents, and abilities are merciful gifts from God. Note how you cannot help but bring an overarching theme of thanksgiving to God when reading and considering a list like this. When your focus shifts from curriculum accomplishment to mercies and thanksgiving, then you are free to work with your children as individual gifts from God, knowing that He is ultimately going to direct their paths as you shepherd them. You are free from the tyranny of the curriculum and the scope and sequence. You are free from unrealistic expectations based upon someone else's description of what your homeschool should look like. You are free then of discouragement, and thus free from burnout.

It ultimately is a focus issue and an understanding of God's truth in our lives. Keep your focus and you will persevere...to God's glory!

Arrested Development

2007-09-24T08:58:00.000-05:00

Anyone who takes a very close look at today's younger culture discovers very quickly that it is populated by people (males, especially) who refuse to grow up and take on the responsibilities and maturity of adulthood. This is a tragedy in individual lives and in individual families, but when it become endemic to a culture, it is a HUGE factor in the collapse of that culture. A culture cannot long survive without young adults doing the things adults are supposed to do...things that build, sustain, and stabilize a culture. Obviously this isn't every single young adult...but there are so many to whom this does apply that, when applied alongside so many other cultural pathologies, well...dare I say that our future as the beacon of freedom and liberty looks quite dim.

Dr. Albert Mohler, president of Southern Seminary, writes in his blog a review of "The Death of the Grown-Up: How America's Arrested Development is Bringing Down Western Civilization." The review is quite good, and I suspect the book is as well. Please take a moment to click over and read what Dr. Mohler has to say...and then do whatever it takes within your own family to keep your children from being part of the problem. Quite literally...our future as a country depends upon just that.

HERE'S the article.

Things I Learned from Voddie, Part I

2007-09-20T22:27:00.000-05:00

Within the first few minutes of Voddie Baucham's first video, he lists five rules for Biblical interpretation. These are rules with which each and every Christian should be equipped, for without them, you will find yourself either erroneously interpreting Biblical text or accepting, out of ignorance, someone else's erroneous interpretations.

Rule 1: Context

Rule 2: Context

Rule 3: Context

Rule 4: Text can't mean what it never meant. (The author had a plain meaning for his text, and you don't have permission to change it! You have to work to discover the author's meaning, and then live with it, whether you like his conclusion or not.)

Rule 5: Narrative is not normative. (Biblical stories are most certainly true, but that doesn't mean they are normatively true as a rule for every Christian. The story of Jonah is true, but we don't expect that Christians will normally get swallowed by large fish as part of a judgment of God.)

Voddie applies these rules to obliterate the common incorrect interpretation and usage of Jeremiah 29:11 ("For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.") This promise wasn't made to you! But is does apply to you. To find out how...listen to the sermon HERE.

The Multigenerational Legacy

2007-09-20T18:12:00.000-05:00

I couldn't even wait to put this one up on the blog. I have NO DOUBT that the 50 minutes you will spend watching and listening to each of the last two messages by Dr. Voddie Baucham will be worth every second. His is a God-centered, God-honoring message to families. We so desperately need to hear the message of looking beyond our own generation or two; we desperately need the message of "legacy," something about which no one seems to consider any longer.

The first video is only 15 minutes and consists of Voddie and his wife, Bridget, talking about raising children and about having an intentional mindset of leaving a multigenerational legacy. It's inspiring. If you don't ever get to the last two...please take a quarter of an hour and listen to the first one. Your family will be better for it.

I'll comment more when I've been able to view this completely myself...but I couldn't wait to share it!

Thanks to Tony Kummer for putting the first sermon up on his blog...where I was able to find it and thus be led to the rest.

Enjoy and be blessed!

The "Saved" Family

2007-09-15T18:45:00.000-05:00

One of the driving forces behind my efforts on the blog is to encourage dads to shepherd their families in such a manner they grow in the knowledge of, love for, and obedience to the Lord Jesus Christ...and display that knowledge, love, and obedience in action as individuals and as a family. Obviously, I assume salvation has occurred in order for this to happen.

But, Dad... you know your family; I don't. Is there evidence of saving faith in your children, in your wife, in you? As part of your discipleship of your children, have you taught them how to examine themselves in light of First John? Do you know how to examine yourself? Have you ever even considered it...or are you relying upon the false American idea of basing the assurance of your salvation upon a "decision" made years previous?

This is critical.

Nothing else written here or anywhere else matters a whit if you, your wife, and your children do not have a saving faith in the Lord Jesus Christ.

I wrote an article on my other blog and then followed it up with five links to remarkable sermons on the subject. May I plead with you, may I urge you to please read the article and listen to the sermons...and then apply what you learn to yourself, your wife, and your children? Eternity is at stake.

My article is accessed by clicking HERE.

The links to the sermons are accessed by clicking HERE.

Motivational Poster for the Emergent Church

2007-09-12T16:00:00.000-05:00

Motivational poster for the Emergent Church and the post-modern mindset in general...goes along well with the concepts addressed in my previous post.

Thanks to the folks at Pyromaniacs for the creativity!

I Don't Homeschool Because...

2007-09-08T21:00:00.000-05:00

It doesn't take much to notice that any time anyone publishes an article in defense of a Biblical admonition to disciple/educate the children of Christians at home, responses come back with arguments for why a family has decided to send their children off to school...usually the government school. Most often these are simply justifications (I read somewhere on another blog a quote..."pitch a rock over a fence, and the dog that yells the loudest is the one hit!"); other times there is a broken heart going along with it because the family would rather not have sent their children away, but felt they had no other choice.

I will also grant that there have been children who have successfully navigated the difficult spiritual territory of the government schools and come out the other end as strong believers. I know some of those young people. I also know they had at least four very important things going for them: 1) They were individuals who were soundly saved. 2) They were not peer dependent, and tended to be natural leaders. 3) They had very strong home lives with parents who discipled them rather than just shuttled them to different activities. 4) They had a strong, God-centered, Bible-preaching church. And lastly...I'm afraid they are the exception, especially given the latest statistics showing well over three-quarters of young people abandon their "faith" shortly after leaving home for post-secondary education. Of course, this means there was no saving faith in the first place...which is all the more reason parents need the discipling time with their children that is otherwise lost to the government school.

What I hope to do with this article is address some of the more common arguments used by those who have sent their children out of the home.

"My children will be missionaries and lights to the school, a 'federally-funded mission field.'"

While I might be able to see a bit of this argument if you are talking about older teens who are exceedingly mature in their faith, this argument is specious when it comes to any other category of child. In the first place, they are in an authoritarian environment where they are to in submission to the teachers. Does anyone honestly believe a child (or even most teens) can handle himself against a prepared person in authority who challenges that child's faith? How exactly is this child supposed to be a missionary? Invite other children to church? He can do that in his own neighborhood! And that's not exactly being a "missionary."

The other more important issue is that the Biblical examples in the New Testament never involve evangelizing children apart from their parents. In fact, it is most often dad who is evangelized, converted...and then his whole household after him! So if you honestly want your child involved in witnessing to others, bring him along with you as you witness to and minister to the dads and moms in your own neighborhood and sphere of influence! Then he not only gets to participate, but he gets to learn how it's done from you. He has no one to teach him how to be a "missionary" at school....

"My children need friends."

If your child cannot live without his age-related peers, then he is peer-dependent. God says that foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child. If your child needs to be around his "friends" that much, you are not helping him to mature, but rather to support the foolishness that is already in his own heart. You are also teaching him to be unable to relate to other age groups, both younger and older. Ideally, you will have a family that is larger than the American norm, and your child will have a built-in set of "friends" of many ages!

"I don't have the education to teach my own child."

Studies published by the Homeschool Legal Defense Association have proven without a doubt that the educational success of homeschooled young people has absolutely no relationship to the education level of their parents! You are a mom or a dad who wants the absolute best for your child. That's the only qualification necessary!

"I want my child to be 'successful'."

What is the ultimate benefit if your child gains the whole world, but loses his soul? What does it mean to be "successful?" If it means a high standard of living in the Disneyworld that is America, it is a woefully inadequate definition. Biblically, "successful" is to know Jesus and to be like Him. Anything else pales in comparison. Exactly how is the officially atheist, multicultural, diversity-worshipping government school going to help your child know Jesus and become like Him? At best, you will be trying to make up time in the few minutes that are left over at the end of the day. A person questioned my use in a previous post of of a statistic, 20-30 minutes of time a day with your children. While it's a generic number, it's not all that far off the mark. The children get up horridly early in the morning to board the bus. When school is over, there is sports practice, time hanging with friends, and homework. You, mom and dad, get whatever is left over...you are in fourth or fifth place in priority for time during the day. Just try countering hours upon hours of postmodern mindset in just a few minutes at the end of the day.... Just how will you prioritize discipling your child to know Jesus and to become like Him???

"But my schools aren't like that..."

Uh-huh.... Invariably people wishing to justify the placement of their children in the government school will say their schools are better than what is described elsewhere, that these schools have Christian influence and morals. Uh-huh.... While your particular school may have a few Christian teachers or administrators, you have no guarantee your child will have that particular teacher. Then add the legal gags that are placed upon these same teachers and administrators and you will not have them able to teach Christianity or the Christian worldview as ultimate truth. Then you have the problem of the books themselves. They are generally published nationally and include all the tripe about multiculturalism, tolerance, and diversity...not to mention the postmodern viewpoint of no absolute truth. Then add in the peer influences from children who don't respect your morals and subject any child trying to bring his parents' morals into the school to untold ridicule. Oh, and don't forget the over-the-top pushing of such great holidays as Halloween and Earth Day. Sorry...while your school may be better than some, it still suffers from the problems inherent to the government school system.

"Both parents need to work to make ends meet."

While I can sympathize with this argument, I am willing to suggest that in most cases "making ends meet" is required because of excessive lifestyle that isn't necessary to the raising of strong, Godly children. How big is the house? How many cars do you have? How many TVs? Cable? How many cell phones? Latest fashions? And on and on. If you buy into the "American Dream" of success, then you will happily go into massive debt to have "bigger and better" and keep up with the neighbors. I know large families who live simply, requiring far less money than many smaller families...and they are raising wonderfully mature, well-adjusted, happy children, all the while homeschooling each of them! Until you are down to not being able to put a roof over your head or food on the table, this argument doesn't hold water. Remember our "greatest generation" was raised during the Depression....

"I would like to homeschool my child, but can't because of ....."

I left the blank at the end of the sentence because the reason are myriad, from a child's handicap to a parent's chronic illness. These are the heartbreaking stories, for you can hear the pain in the parents' hearts, desiring to disciple and educate their children at home, but cannot do it alone. They need help.

And here's where my answer may surprise you. I agree with their decision.

Why...especially given what I've written previously and now?

I agree because they truly cannot raise their children at home...and the government is the only entity that has stepped up to help them. The church used to fulfill this function. They were the community that stepped in to help each other. But the church has abdicated many of its functions to the government, which has happily taken them on. Thus in cases where the church should have been available to help, they weren't...and so the family turns to the only place it can for help: the government.

I know of some churches that are different, that are trying to reclaim the jurisdiction that is rightly theirs. They value so highly the Biblical admonition to disciple children at home that they have made it a priority in their congregations. They are intentional about several things. First, they have no buildings and no paid staff. That means that every single penny of offering goes to ministry and missions. They have taught their congregation the meaning of Christian community and the priority other Christians should have in each other's lives. So, for instance, if there is a single mom in the congregation, they require her to attempt to go to her family for support and help. If the family won't help, then they ask her to voluntarily place herself under the leadership of one of the elders. If she will do that, the church will do everything necessary, from money to physical help in her home, to allow her to disciple and educate her children at home.

This is what should happen in the lives of people using this reason not to homeschool. But sadly, in America today, the church is all about a voluntary association of autonomous individuals looking for individual fulfillment. The Bride of Christ has given up her responsibilities to her members. And the government has overstepped its jurisdictional bounds and taken over.

So to those who are in this situation, I am truly sorry for you. I wish your church understood and was different. But it probably isn't, and so you are doing the best you can. Please don't feel chastised by those of us who passionately believe in discipling at home. Some of us, anyway, understand.

To everyone else...well...how about meditating on Deuteronomy 6, Ephesians 6, Psalm 1, and the whole book of Proverbs to start? How about acting upon what you find there? Put the Word into action in your life...and disciple your children at home!

Results of Scripture Memorization

2007-09-02T15:13:00.000-05:00

To echo Tony at "The Kummeropolis"...why can't I do this? Take 11 minutes and receive the blessings of hearing Hebrews 9 and 10 recited in a manner as if it were being preached live by the original author. It's stunning. He's not using some weak translation, either; he's preaching the English Standard Version, yet it is immensely understandable.

And then consider how to discipline and teach yourself and your entire family how to memorize Scripture. A good method suggested by Ruth Beechick can be found HERE. (Note: She does recommend using the King James. I am not a KJV-only advocate, but would suggest that you use as literal a translation as possible. That would be NAS, ESV, KJV...and not NIV.) I suspect that memorizing this way could lead to being able to recite Scripture in a manner similar to this gentleman from Sovereign Grace Ministries:

An Essential Component of Manhood...

2007-08-31T11:01:00.000-05:00

For those of you discipling boys to be solid, Christian men...here's a post on my other blog that will help you in that endeavor! Enjoy...and practice it yourself at church this weekend!

Family Driven Faith YouTube Videos

2007-08-30T23:02:00.000-05:00

A few weeks ago, I posted on the release of Dr. Voddie Baucham's new book, Family Driven Faith. Thanks to Tony at For His Glory, I found a new section of YouTube entitled "Broadcast Yourself." It allows a person to put many of his own videos in one place. In this case, Dr. Baucham has placed fourteen videos as of the date of this posting...all are short, usually less than two minutes. They are simply videos of him discussing different aspects of the issues raised in his book. The video below is a sample...Dr. Baucham describing what it means to be a disciple...quite apropos for this particular blog...and a straight up call for parents (Dads in particular) to be the discipler of his children. You can find the rest of the videos HERE...be sure to watch the one entitled, "Put the Baby in the Beemer"...for it is a short poem that is a devastating critique of United States cultural norms today.

May they be a challenge and an encouragement to you as you strive to raise your family in the Lord.

It's That Time of Year....

2007-08-28T20:37:00.000-05:00

Late August/Early September...it's that time of year again. You know it from all the sales going on at the stores. In fact, I heard (no hard evidence) that the sales of back-to-school supplies and dorm furnishing supplies are second only to Christmas! Yes, it's the time of year that most of America kiss their young ones goodbye, pack them onto the yellow bus, and then head off to do whatever it is these adults do when their children are not with them.... These moms (and dads) are assuming they are doing the best by their children and that if the little ones will just apply themselves, they will be "successful" in life. The officially godless, multicultural, diversity-embracing, tolerance-teaching government school will see to it for them....

I just finished John MacArthur's new book, The Truth War (available with just a click on the left of my blog). In it he battles the mindset of what is known as the Emergent Church, a mindset that affects virtually all in the Western world today, regardless of church affiliation. That mindset is post-modernism...and that is the worldview that will be both officially and unofficially inculcated into your children in the government school.

So what sort of ideas characterize post-modernism?

MacArthur writes, "Objectivity is an illusion. Nothing is certain, and the thoughtful person will never speak with too much conviction about anything. Strong convictions about any point of truth are judged supremely arrogant and hopelessly naive. Everyone is entitled to his own truth." And later, "In the postmodern perspective, certainty is regarded as inherently arrogant, elitist, intolerant, oppressive and therefore always wrong (emphasis added)."

Your children will be taught over and over again that there is no such thing as absolute truth (except of course, the absolute truth that there is no absolute truth!). And they will be taught that anyone with a truth claim and its accompanying certainty is arrogant, intolerant, and ultimately always wrong.

What is scary is this viewpoint has crept into the church unnoticed and affects even some of the most mature believers. I have been on the receiving end of it. By proclaiming with certainty what I believe to be true about subjects ranging from Reformed Theology to childrearing to education, I have been pronounced "arrogant" by those bearing opposite opinions. Rather than deal with the issues at hand and attempt to debate them with God's Word as the referee, the attack has always been a personal one led by the charge of arrogance and thus a minimizing of my point of view. I have been told that I am not "humble," and that if I were only "humble," my viewpoints would be heard.

MacArthur writes again, "one of the highest values (if not the supreme virtue by which all others are measured) is a particular notion of 'humility'--namely, the standard postmodern species of humility, which starts with the assumption that certainty, assurance, and bold conviction are arrogant and therefore wrong." Therefore to be "humble" in the eyes of most of the church today, one cannot express anything with certainty, assurance, or bold conviction. Your viewpoint might be heard, but you must present it with the mindset that you have no conviction about it, that it couldn't actually be true for everyone! MacArthur points out that the humility being called for here "is actually a form of unbelief, rooted in an impudent refusal to acknowledge that God has been sufficiently clear in His self-revelation to His creatures." (Doctrine of perspicuity anyone? Oops...that would be an absolute truth!)

This leads to nothing more than everyone doing what is right in their own eyes...and all the attendant societal maladies that accompany such folly.

Church! Wake up! If you are calling someone arrogant for expressing conviction, then you are exposing your post-modern worldview. You do not have a Biblical worldview in play.

So back to the school issue.... By entrusting your children to the schools eight hours a day, you are virtually guaranteeing they will internalize the post-modern mindset of "broad-mindedness", "diversity", and "tolerance." There will be indoctrination going on. Would you like to see some of it at its worst? Click here and watch the two videos. They are from a film created over a decade ago and still distributed today to activist teachers. Watch the young, impressionable minds being twisted by the propaganda being spewed by authority figures they trust. Your gut will churn in revulsion at the raping of these precious children's souls. And worse...this was a decade ago. Do you really think it's gotten better? No matter how "good" you think your particular school is, you do your children a huge disservice if you don't monitor every single thing they are taught, to include every single book they read, so that you might counter (in the 20-30 minutes of free time a day you have with them) the anti-Biblical bias that pervades all subjects and virtually all peer conversations.

But better yet... why send them off in the first place? So you can have time with other moms? So you can clean your house better? So you can indulge yourself a bit? Really, none of those desires are bad in small doses. But the desire to rid yourself of your children eight hours a day is fraught with poor priorities. There are moms in our neighborhood that take bottles of champagne to the bus stop on the first day of school so they can celebrate their freedom from little Jenny and little Johnny as soon as they are on the bus! Just how sad is that?!

Consider why you do what you do. Ostensibly you are sending them off so they will one day be a "success," and "education" is the ultimate means to that success. Unfortunately you are again showing your post-modern mindset. I believe it was A.W. Tozer (I've been reading a lot of books lately and lost track of where this came from) who points out that "education" to the post-modern mind is seen as salvation. Every problem in life can be solved by more education. That viewpoint is the unspoken basis of why you do what you do with your children. Education=success=salvation.

Instead, what about consulting the Bible...in particular Deuteronomy 6, Ephesians 6, Psalm 1, and the entire book of Proverbs? Note God's overarching themes and desires: Among other things, note that the father is charged to raise up a child who is wise (as opposed to "smart"), who fears the Lord, who handles the Word of God well, who loves God with all his heart, soul, mind and strength and his neighbor as himself (actual practical outworking of faith), who takes on mature adult responsibilities. In short, what God desires is summed up in the concept of discipleship. Note well that none of this will happen in any group classroom, but particularly not in a government school classroom. For example, when was the last time a child developed "wisdom" from his peers, all of whom have foolishness bound up in their hearts? All that the world says is important in education is absent from God's priorities. Calculus, foreign language, grammar, history, lab science (everything we tend to focus upon and brag about to our neighbors)...none of them are first in line. Are they important? In a sense, potentially...but the bottom line is they are all secondary! A solidly saved child who grows into adulthood as a young person of wisdom and Biblical accuracy will affect his world, will strengthen and expand the Kingdom, will spread the Gospel of our Lord, and will be pleasing in the sight of God, regardless of how the secondary subjects are mastered. But a child who masters the secondary subjects at the expense of salvation, Biblical wisdom, Biblical maturity, and Biblical love brings nothing of value to his world; but rather he brings the worldly materialism that so engulfs most in the United States and ultimately, his efforts will be nothing but a stench in God's nostrils. (Oops...there I go being "arrogant" again!)

A.W. Tozer in "Rut, Rot, or Revival" states, "'Society,' said Emerson, 'is in conspiracy to make every man like every other man.' But what he did not say was that society is in a conspiracy to make every man ungodly in his thinking (emphasis added)." That about sums it up. As you are making your educational choices, you must take your head out of the sand and understand that society at large, and thus the government schools (and most "Christian schools" as well) are in a conspiracy to make your children just like everyone else. And "everyone else" will be ungodly and postmodern in their thinking, to include "wrong ambition, love of money, overappreciation of earthly things, jealousy and envy,..." "broad-minded," "tolerant," and "diversity-loving."

As I have written before...exactly what kind of young adult do you want at the end of your parenting years? What characteristics do you want to see? What is your Biblically-based definition of "success?" Your answers to these and similar questions will drive the decisions and priorities you make today...which will dramatically impact who your children become as adults. Do you really want them to be like "everyone else"????

Paul Washer's Youth Evangelism Sermon (Condensed Version)

2007-08-28T13:49:00.000-05:00

Back in February I provided a post that included a YouTube video of a full hour-long sermon by Paul Washer, a sermon given to a Southern Baptist Youth Evangelism group. That sermon was my introduction to Pastor Washer's extremely powerful preaching. Since then I have listened to hours upon hours of his sermons, each one strongly containing the power of the Gospel. For those who haven't had the encouragement to listen to the full-length sermon, someone has put together the highlights of the sermon mentioned above and created a video of it. (Disclaimer: The creator of the video took some creative license and used the History Channel logo as if the video were from that station. Obviously, it's not....)

May you be blessed by what you hear...and even better, may you and your children find your salvation through repentance and faith in Jesus Christ alone, and not from a "decision."

The Unexamined Life

2007-08-03T21:33:00.000-05:00

A.W. Tozer in Rut, Rot or Revival: The Condition of the Church is quoted as saying, "The philosopher Socrates said, 'An unexamined life is not worth living.' If a common philosopher could think that, how much more we Christians ought to listen to the Holy Spirit when He says, 'Examine yourself.' An unexamined Christian lies like an unattended garden. Let your garden go unattended for a few months, and you will not have roses and tomatoes but weeds. An unexamined Christian life is like an unkempt house. Lock your house up as tight as you will and leave it long enough, and when you come back you will not believe the dirt that got in from somewhere. An unexamined Christian is like an untaught child. A child that is not taught will be a little savage. It takes examination, teaching, instruction, discipline, caring, tending, weeding, and cultivating to keep the life right."

Lest we blindly go through life erroneously believing we are saved, we need to examine ourselves as commanded by God. As parents, we need to examine our children as best we can, and then as they mature, teach them to examine themselves. All this reminds me once more of a fantastic sermon by Paul Washer that should be part of any serious Christian's collection. It can be found here, either to listen online or to download. I personally place them all on my ipod in a "Washer" playlist and listen whenever I'm in the car...sure beats the rot on the radio!

To Love the Word

2007-06-25T21:33:00.000-05:00

A relative newcomer to my world is Paul Washer, seasoned missionary and pastor for the Southern Baptist Convention. His preaching reflects a deep love and fear of God like none other I have heard. He pulls no punches, and regularly takes American Christianity and his own denomination to task for its reliance upon culture and tradition instead of Bible. I have listened and relistened to hours and hours of his sermons, and go back for more because he takes me to a place I rarely see, but wish to find...a place nearer to God and His holiness. Some may call his preaching "hard"...but I find it challenging and convicting as he uses God's Word to fillet my wicked heart and refill it with God's grace and mercy.

Most recently I have been listening to a series of sermons entitled "To Love the Word"...meditations on Deuteronomy 6:1-9. As I post this, I haven't quite finished the second one...but he spends a lot of time focusing on the application of loving the Word to dad's role of bringing that Word to bear in his family. Thus the appropriateness of commending these sermons on this blog.

You can listen directly at these links, or register and download them in mp3 format for free.

Enjoy!

To Love the Word, Part I

To Love the Word, Part II

To Love the Word, Part III

To Love the Word, Part IV

Voddie's Latest Scribblings

2007-06-22T21:53:00.000-05:00

Dr. Voddie Baucham, one of my favorite preachers and authors (as is attested to by the link to his blog over on the left), is out with his latest book, Family Driven Faith. I've been looking forward to its release for some time now. Dr. Baucham certainly "walks his talk" ... and his talk is written in a very readable, yet very direct manner. In the first chapter, he quickly defines the problem...extremely large percentages of the young people in his denomination (Southern Baptist) are leaving the faith as young adults. Then he turns to the root cause...the primacy of human wisdom over Biblical wisdom in most of our life decisions. You will find yourself nodding in agreement...and occasionally twitching from the sting of a point that is too close to home. But you will be drawn to discover the antidote he derives from his study of the Word.

If you resonate with the content of this blog and it's sister blog...you will find this book to be a rewarding read.

Every Day is Mother's Day!

2007-06-05T22:41:00.000-05:00

It's now a couple of weeks after the Sunday in which we here in America honor our mothers. Although this post could have been written right at Mother's Day, I chose to wait a bit so as to make it more unique, and not just one more post on mothers at the appropriately timed part of the year.

I write this blog in hopes of collecting my thoughts on discipling my own children and in hopes of possibly inspiring and encouraging others to do to the same. But that discipling is going to be very difficult to accomplish all my myself. There is a good reason God gave Adam a wife and there is a good reason God gave me my wife. Part of that reason is that I am not whole without her nor am I capable of carrying out God's mandate for my family alone.

In one of my original posts in this blog, I wrote of the necessity of putting the marriage before the children. That has not changed. A dad who desires to disciple his children will first romance his wife. He will love and cherish her. He will recognize her as God's second-best gift, second only to His gift of salvation. He will work hard to resist the temptation to put her second to the children. He will honor her in her work in the family. He will remember to work to make sure she remains his best friend.

I have certainly not always done these things; in fact, I have often fallen woefully short. But that doesn't change the fact that these types of activities exhibit leadership, exhibit love, and help to create a marriage that glorifies God as an image of the relationship between Christ and His bride, the Church.

Would you join me in honoring your own bride, she who is not only your wife, but an Image-bearer of God and your sister in Christ? And not just on the one day a year as proclaimed by Hallmark, but on every day of the year.... In doing so, you build a family that honors your Lord. In doing so, you set the foundation for discipling your children. In doing so, you set an example for your children of what marriage should be. In doing so, you bring glory to God.

And the Two Shall Become One

2007-04-25T00:34:00.000-05:00

I haven't posted in quite some time...and I know there are people who regularly stop by. So I thought an explaination would be in order.

First...it's a very busy time of year.

Second...and most importantly...I am experiencing the inexpressable love, forgiveness, and perseverance of the woman who is my bride. She looks beyond my faults, my hard-headedness, my poor communication skills, my stumblings and loves me anyway. She deserves much of the time I have been spending on my blogs. Thus although I will continue to write, my postings will be less frequent.

This woman, this Image-bearer, whom God has given me brings a spark to my soul that builds me up and makes me desire to be the husband she deserves, the father our children deserve. I still have a pre-marriage picture of her with her green eyes sparkling and her smile that brightens a room. And now, after a marriage that is measured in multiple decades, those eyes still sparkle, and her smile still lights this man's heart! And yet, it's not truly her physical beauty that touches deepest; it is her touch, her encouragement, her love, both for me and for our Savior.

The Proverbs ask, "An excellent wife, who can find?" My answer is that I couldn't find her...rather, God found her and graciously brought her to me. It is through His sovereign will that we met and married all those years ago. It is to Him I owe thanksgiving and praise for the bride of my youth. And it is to my bride and my love that I publically bring praise in this blog.

Sweetheart...I love you.

And to those men who read my humble musings...may God see fit to bless you as well with such a wife.

Just Another Flavor of Ice Cream?

2007-03-27T07:49:00.000-05:00

We subscribe to Randy Alcorn's quarterly newsletter (Eternal Perspective Ministries). Alcorn always includes a section of inspiriational quotations. Whenever my wife finds anything that is inspirational, she clips it or adds it to a quote book she keeps. Providentially, one of the quotations from a past newsletter fell out of her book and I found it. It was by one of my favorite authors and theologians, A.W. Tozer! He writes (emphasis in the quotation is mine):

"The church's mightiest influence is felt when she is different from the world in which she lives. Her power lies in her being different, rises with the degree in which she differs and sinks as the difference diminishes.

This is so fully and clearly taught in the Scriptures and so well illustrated in Church history that it is hard to see how we can miss it. But miss it we do, for we hear constantly that the Church must try to be as much like the world as possible, excepting, of course, where the world is too, too sinful....

Let us plant ourselves on the hill of Zion and invite the world to come over to us, but never under any circumstances will we go over to them. The cross is the symbol of Christianity, and the cross speaks of death and separation, never of compromise. No one ever compromised with a cross. The cross separated between the dead and the living. The timid and fearful will cry "Extreme!" and they will be right. The cross is the essence of all that is extreme and final. The message of Christ is a call across a gulf from death to life, from sin to righteousness, and from Satan to God." ...The Set of the Sail, pp 35, 36

When Tozer advocates the "church" being different from the world, he is not speaking of a building nor is he speaking of a segregated part of our lives that should be different. In several of his other writings he points out that for the "church" to have certain characteristics, the "Christians" in the church must have those characteristics. So for the church to be different, the Christians in the church must be different…and it is an all-inclusive difference. We can't be different in just certain segments of our lives. As Christians, our lives should every day become more and more illustrative of a holy life based upon the Word of God. This is sanctification; becoming more and more like our Savior, Jesus Christ.

So why is it so critical to be "different?"

We as Christians are charged to influence our world, to take dominion over it, and to penetrate the darkness with the light of the Gospel. Tozer is absolutely correct when he posits that the church's influence and power varies directly with her difference from the world. When we as the church are compromising with the culture, we are weak. When we are different, we are strong. Why? A church that has compromised is just one more selection in the smorgasbord of ideas with nothing distinct to offer...one more flavor of ice cream in one of those shops with 30 different flavors. But when a church is distinctively different and stands in stark contrast to everything else in the world, it illuminates the cravenness and false hope that is offered by the world. We would no longer be just "one more flavor," but rather a distinctly different light streaming into the darkness.

Tozer's third paragraph seems especially appropriate given that this post is being composed during Holy Week. The Cross is our focus for it is where our redemption was accomplished. Will we stand and call the world to come to us, to die to their sin and to live to Christ? Or will we downplay our distinctiveness, compromise with the world, and go over to them? Remember when well-meaning people tell us to build bridges to the unregenerate that "bridges" offer traffic in both directions…and compromise is inevitable!

Tozer recognizes that we will be called "extreme" when we determine to stand on the Bible in all facets of our lives. Yet he realizes that the message of the Cross IS extreme, and it is that very extremism that brings life to the dead. If we truly love our neighbors, we will desire to bring that Life to them…and that involves being "extremely" different.

As we raise our children (and just live our lives), do we ever sit down and consider just how much of what we do is influenced by our culture, i.e. "the world"? How "different" are we? I dare say that for most people who go by the name "evangelical," the difference is minimal and usually restricted to a short list of things we don't do…sort of like Tozer declaring that the church is like the world, except where the world is too sinful. Where is the distinctiveness, the difference? Where is the aroma of Christ?

OK…so we are to be different. How might that be accomplished?

There is certainly a myriad of ways for Christians to be distinct from the world. I would suggest a good place for the individual and his family to start would be here.

But this is a blog about discipling our children. How would this apply in the raising of our progeny? First, please note that our world has seduced us into raising a generation that is becoming known as "Generation Me"…a generation that is so completely focused on self and self-esteem as to not even comprehend concepts such as duty and service to others. Sean McDowell has an excellent article on Generation Me here. So one way to be "different" is to raise our children in such a way that they do not subscribe to the narcissistic ways of Generation Me. Again, there are many ways to do this, but here are two suggestions:

1) Practice hospitality in your home on a regular basis (please note that hospitality is different from entertaining). Make your home a place of comfort, refuge, and witness to your neighbors and people you don't know in your church. After all, hospitality is literally "love of strangers." But more importantly, involve your children as their maturity allows. They should be assisting in preparing the meal, serving it, and cleaning up afterwards. They should be at the table participating in the conversation. But most of all, they should be learning the necessity of serving others.

2) Through the practice of hospitality, you will actually get to know your neighbors. When there is a need, your children should be part of the solution. If they are young, then they should be helping one of the parents as the parent seeks to minister. If they are older, then they can be directly involved in ministering to those in need. But if you are following the world's direction for rearing children, that would be very difficult. Your children are most likely in a school, where most of their day is taken up. Then they will have after-school activities and sports, not to mention homework. Their entire day will be spoken for in activities for building up "self", leaving no time for the critically important lesson of serving others in the name of Christ.

So maybe the first step will be rethinking what exactly you are trying to accomplish in raising your children and then asking yourself if the way you are going about it is taking you in that direction. If you want to avoid "Generation Me" for your children while creating a family that has a very distinct Christian witness, look at what the world says to do…and then do the opposite! Your family will show Christ as not just another flavor of ice cream, but as the treasure He really is. And for raising your children to know Christ and make Him known, your children will one day rise up and call you blessed...and many of those to whom your family ministered will join you around the throne in eternity in joyful worship of our Father.

To me, that makes "different" sound extremely good....

To Be or Not To Be

2007-03-06T12:08:00.000-06:00

Think of the most common question your children are asked about their future, especially as they enter the mid-teen years and later: “What are you going to BE?” Think of the answers that are usually given: doctor, engineer, nurse, musician, etc.

Note the link our culture places between what you do and who you are.

But how true is it? I contend that for the Christian, it is a dangerous falsehood. It doesn’t take much thought to realize that there shouldn’t be a connection between the two. Unfortunately we tend to equate the two, to our detriment.

I have a friend who is an airline pilot. He suffered a medical condition in midlife that caused him to lose his medical qualification to fly, forcing him to medically retire in his early forties. He tells of wandering aimlessly through life, unsure of who he was. This is because he had completely equated what he did (airline pilot) with who he was (airline pilot). When the one was taken from him, who he was ended up taken as well. (The good news is that his medical was restored many years later and he returned to flying status…but this time he understands that flying is only what he does.)

Consider how many people go through midlife crises. (Yes, I’m playing psychologist here.) Could it be that they, too, have attached who they are to what they do? At midlife, you start to discover that your career progression is probably not going like you planned in your younger years. The end of your career appears on the horizon. What you do has turned out to be somewhat mediocre and will soon end. Therefore, who you are is also mediocre and will soon end, leaving you aimlessly wandering through later life (or trying to hit a little white ball into several holes each day).

It only takes a moment of introspection to realize how much we as Christian parents have bought into that very same lie and how we communicate it to our children. What is the primary focus of our child-raising? I heard of a Barna poll of Christian parents that showed a horrifyingly large number of them considered their first parenting objective to be to raise a child who was “successful” (meaning economic and worldly success). Even worse was the number who listed raising their child to know Christ as the third or fourth most important objective…or didn’t list knowing Christ at all!!! This shows one of two things: either how parents use the moniker “Christian” when they aren’t really a Christian, or how deeply they are submersed in the American culture of “success.” We raise our children with a primary focus on career…what they will do…and communicate both our success or our failure as parents as well as the child’s success or failure as a young adult with how they do regarding what they will do/be. Knowing God and having a lively, intimate relationship with Him is considered something that just “happens” as long as we get them to attend church and youth group. Could this improper focus on what a child will do instead of who a child is be why 75-88% of young adults walk away from the faith of their parents?

I see two applications here:

One…for us as adults. We need to take a good look at ourselves and have an honest evaluation of whether we consider who we are as what we do. I know that is especially a factor in many men’s lives, but probably also in many women’s as well. So in truth, who are we? If you have repented of your sin, placed full trust in Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, then you are a Christian…a blood-bought, heaven-bound adopted child of God, with all the attendant responsibilities and privileges. You are not what you do. That could go away tomorrow and it would not change you at your core. This is a freedom those who put so much weight on what they do cannot ever comprehend. You are free in Christ to live a life of Christian love and service, to the glory of God. You are free of the tyranny of the career; you are free of being defined in terms of economic output. In reality, as a Christian, you will make the best employee your employer could ever ask for…but you do it because you are free NOT to do it should God call elsewhere.

Two…for your children. Are they Christians? Have you led them to the Lord? Are they showing fruits of the Spirit? If not, then this discussion as far as they are concerned is moot. All of your efforts need to be geared toward entreating God to bring them into the Kingdom. If you are reasonably confident they are saved, do you disciple them? Do you communicate their worth as who they are in Christ? Or do you communicate their worth as their grades, their standardized test scores, their success in sports, and their career direction? Do they know in the deepest recesses of their hearts that they are loved and cherished by their Creator and that HE alone reserves the right to define who they are and that they are His children? Only then will they be protected from the mental anguish of being defined by the world based on their economic productivity. Only then will they be protected from the feelings of loss that accompany an unstable career. Only then will they have self-esteem that arises from the correct source.

Imagine a family where each member knows beyond a shadow of a doubt that he or she is a child of the King. Each of them will be growing in Christlikeness. Each of them will be embracing their roles as defined by their Creator. Each of them will be growing in love for one another and for the lost of the world. Each of them will be growing in maturity and wisdom because they know the fear of God, which is where one finds true maturity and wisdom. Each of them will have an accurate self-worth based on truth instead of on worldly definitions. As a family, they will be grounded; they will be a rock. And they will be a witness of the glory of God to the lost and dying in this world.

So…to be or not to be…will you be a child of God, or will you be a doctor, a lawyer, a mechanic, or a ditch-digger? Will your children be children of God, or will they also hang their worth on being a nurse, an engineer, a plumber, or a pilot?

A Shocking Sermon

2007-02-24T22:19:00.000-06:00

This is a video of Southern Baptist missionary and evangelist Paul David Washer has he addresses 3000 youth at an evangelism conference a couple of years ago. He has an incredible message...yet an in-your-face and a message hard for those of us in America to hear.

Should you encounter difficulties with the YouTube presentation below, you can access audio, video, or transcribed (printed) versions of his sermon here.

Please set aside one hour and listen. The Holy Spirit will use Paul to pierce your heart. Then set aside some more time for a prayer of response.

Life Relevance in Education

2007-02-21T20:25:00.000-06:00

In an earlier post, I asked the question, "What IS education?" and the conclusions I reached were validated in a "Generations with Kevin Swanson" archived radio program I was listening to today.

I pointed out that my own experience (and most likely the experience of all reading this) was that the only things I actually "learned" were those things that I put into practice. The rest of it went in, bounced around for a while (usually long enough to take a test on it), and was forgotten...in other words, it was never really "learned." Just ask any high school or college student about a class they took a year ago and have since had no other exposure to the material...and you will find they don't remember more than a small smattering of what they supposedly "learned."

One of the points made on the radio program is that the style of learning we use in our school classrooms traces its roots back to the Greek system. In the Greek philosophy of education, knowledge was divorced from life; thus the famous sculpture of the Greek Thinker...sitting and pondering all day, but not actually doing anything with his knowledge.

The other point backs up what I was saying. The Hebraic model, which is arguably validated in the book of James, says that there must be life application to knowledge or it is useless. We must be doers of the Word! We can study it all day long, but if we don't do the Word, our faith is in vain. Obviously James is referring to how a Christian is to live out his faith. But the argument can be made that it applies to learning of any subject. If you don't actually use the knowledge, then it fades away and was basically not worth the time you spent "learning" it. For those who may be unfamiliar, there are several levels of learning. One of the highest is application. If one is to apply the knowledge, he must grasp its intricacies fairly well. Application sinks roots into the brain, causing the knowledge to be retained. It is only then that it is truly "learned."

Does anyone remember sitting in a classroom and asking themselves what use the course they were taking had? Do you remember being bored to death in that class? Do you NOT remember much at all from your time in that class? I think we can all relate to these questions.

So how about applying the answers to the teaching of your own children? When you are asking them to learn something, be sure you can articulate a relevant reason for learning it...and even more importantly, if at all possible, put it into immediate life application where it is actually used. When your child can see a reason for expending the effort required to learn something, not only is it far easier to remain motivated, but the material will actually be retained. And even better...because it is related to real life, your child's real life is improved!

Toward more reality in education!

Preparing for Our Culture's Future

2007-02-02T20:02:00.000-06:00

On the last Sunday in January, Dr. John Piper began a mini-series of sermons on the topic of marriage. (This first sermon can be accessed here, either in text, audio, or video format.) My purpose here isn't to enter into the topic of marriage, but to key off of two things he said in his introduction regarding what our culture is like and what its probable future is. They support and build upon my last post in this blog.

In the first quote (actually the second in the order of the sermon), Pastor Piper says, "The fact that we live in a society that can even conceive of—let alone defend—two men or two women entering a relationship and with wild inconceivability calling it marriage, shows that the collapse of our culture into debauchery and barbarism and anarchy is probably not far away."

If Pastor Piper is correct, he is describing a world for our children that is nothing like we have seen any time in our lifetimes... debauchery, barbarism, anarchy. Those are not terms used to describe a civilized society that values liberty and freedom. This is not a pleasant thought, both for ourselves if we should live that long, or for our progeny. The freedoms we enjoy now...particularly our freedom to worship God with all our heart, mind, soul, and strength...may indeed be in grave danger in the not-too-distant future. Just witness the taking of children from their parents and the jailing of those same parents in Germany just because the parents had the audacity to homeschool and not wish state indoctrination for their children. Witness how people of faith cannot speak out against the sin of sodomy in most of Europe or in Canada without incurring the wrath of the state against them. How long will it be before those types of laws (and many that will be worse) come to our land? The battle is already on, and it doesn't appear to be going our way.... This is likely the world into which our children and grandchildren will be going. How are we preparing them?

That brings me to the second quote. Dr. Piper says, "...to the world we live in, where the main idol is self, and its main doctrine is autonomy, and its central act of worship is being entertained, and its two main shrines are the television and the cinema, and its most sacred genuflection is the uninhibited act of sexual intercourse." (Piper's never been known for pulling any punches!)

Before we sit and cluck-cluck about the state of our world, I would rather investigate these same descriptions as they relate to the church...that means us! We are living in our culture, and unless we are extremely observant and particularly intentional, we will absorb its values. So assuming this is an accurate description of our culture, we need to take a sobering, honest look at ourselves to see how much of a description it is of us...and then do something about it, especially as it relates to the raising of our children!

The Main Idol is Self

It's all about me! Right?! My wants. My desires. My loves. Recognition of me. Exultation of me. It's probably not quite that blatant, but how many of us spend our time bemoaning how things aren't going our way? How much time and money is spent on self-help? How much focus is on improving ourselves through exercise, education, etc? Is there any time left for others? Is there any hope of a life of service? Not when others and service are secondary to the building and improving of one's self!

And if we as parents have this focus, what are we teaching our children? Do they learn to put the needs of others before their own? Do they learn the joy of serving others and how that puts a real face on the Gospel? They will imitate us. We must let them see us placing the Lord Jesus on the throne and see us daily killing the idol of self.

"But wait!" you say. "I serve my children by seeing to their needs. I even devote my life to them by homeschooling them! So obviously I'm not guilty of this!" Maybe. It depends on how you go about it. If deep inside you are raising them so you can compare them to the other children in your circle of friends, your focus is most certainly on the idol of self. If you are doing everything for them, bending over backwards to give them everything they ever desire and never discipling them in the ways of loving and serving their fellow man...starting with their own family...then you are contributing the building of the idol of self in them.

Idols are insidious. We have to examine our own hearts carefully, and root them out through repentance and action when they are found. Our culture creates this idol, especially in children. If we don't make a distinct break from raising our children the way the world does, they will have a well-constructed, solid idol to self by the time they are young adults.

Main Doctrine is Autonomy

This one is a natural follow-on to the idol of self. When the self is an idol, it naturally wants to be autonomous, a law unto one's self, not wishing to submit to anything or anyone. This is the antithesis of the Christian life. All Christians are to submit to the Lordship of Jesus Christ. And then God has defined the lines of authority even farther by requiring wives to submit to husbands, children to submit to parents, and slaves to submit to masters. There is also an element of submission to the church that can be extrapolated from the concept of church discipline.

When we chafe at these God-ordained lines of authority/submission, we are following the doctrine of autonomy.

A subset of autonomy is independence. Someone who is autonomous is also independent, self-sufficient. Do we define ourselves by our membership in our family...or as individuals who just happen to be, for the moment, in a group called a family? Do we bring our families into accountable community with other Christian families...or do we stay comfortably distant?

As we raise our children, are we raising them to submit to their parents? Are we modeling happy submission in our own lives? Are we emphasizing the family? Are we training them to value their place of service and ministry within the family...or are we training them to leave for a life of autonomous independence at age 18?

The Central Act of Worship is Being Entertained

If we have made an idol of ourselves and are living by the principle doctrine of autonomy, then it would follow that our worship would be focused inwardly. Entertainment does that in a marvelous way, making us feel emotions, releasing endorphins in our brains, and generally making us feel good. Look at our culture: it's all about being entertained, from 150 channels of TV, to the latest Playstation, to the movie theaters with 16 screens, to the year-round emphasis on sporting events (both pro and college), to 150 channels of satellite radio. Pop culture is built around the entertainment industry.

So what about us? Where's our focus? Even most churches these days are focused on self-help, therapeutic "gospels" and worship that makes us feel good. There's one megachurch in my city that just built a new gargantuan sanctuary that even includes theater seating with cup holders for the worshipper's coffee! It's not about God; it's about ensuring the worshipper has his caffeine fix during the service!

But worship isn't about us; it's about God! The really neat thing about true worship is that when we are lost in exulting the grandeur of God, we get the byproduct of joy! (As Piper says, "God gets the glory, and we get the joy!") Do we approach our worship with those types of intentions and expectations? Have our children learned to look outside themselves to the wonder that is the Creator? Do you model that yourself? (Here's a wonderful way to start that mindset. Click on "enter", then on "Watch Louie's Talks Online" and then scroll to "Indescribable". You will discover a very big God there!)

Two Main Shrines are the Television and the Cinema

How much time do you spend in front of the TV or at the movies? When you do watch these media, what messages do you allow into your mind? The medium itself is conducive to dulling the ability to engage and consider the messages sent. Since you can guarantee that Hollywood isn't interested in building up your Christian faith, you can expect the messages that are sent, subtle or not, to be against everything God has in mind for you as a growing Christian. And since your ability to consider and counter those messages is dulled, those messages take up residence in your mind and tempt you away from the holy life to which God has called you.

Your media habits as well as your interest in them (compare how excited you are about the latest movie compared to how excited you are about church on Sunday) are a prime example for your children and they will pick up on what you do and what you watch very quickly. How much do you allow for your own children? Do you screen what they are watching? Do you help them watch for the anti-Christian messages that are so prevalent, but not always so obvious (dads are always stupid; mom is slightly better; children are the founts of wisdom; belief in God should be personal; there are no absolutes; tolerance is the ultimate virtue...and on and on and on)?

Most Sacred Genuflection is the Uninhibited Act of Sexual Intercourse

Let's face it. Sex is everywhere. We as parents, and especially as men, have to be so very careful about what we expose ourselves to and what we do with it when we encounter it unexpectedly. We must be disciplined about our thought life. We must reserve sexual thoughts for our wives only. As couples, we must work to have a regular, happy, vigorous sex life...for that is how God intended it. I can think of several positive things this does: it creates a tight bond between husband and wife, it gives a good example for the children, and it helps the men with the issues described earlier in this paragraph.

We must be open with our children in discussing sex with them at age-appropriate times. They must come to value purity. We must set before them a beautiful picture of the wedding altar and what they will experience there and in their marriage bed. It must be a far better picture than what the world is giving them every minute of every day. We do this through discussions and through examples. We have to talk with them. When we see young people getting married who have kept themselves pure, they need to be held up as positive examples. And we as parents need to be examples of a happy sex life. (Don't think for a moment that your older children don't know and can't tell when your sex life is good and when it's not.) Give them a reason to reject the world's standard for sex: the instant gratification of an animal-desire.

So without it even being his main point, Pastor Piper has given us both a description of the world to come and a method for us to stand against it.

If we are to bring the Kingdom and the Gospel to bear upon a world that has degenerated into debauchery, barbarism, and anarchy, then we absolutely must:

kill the idol of self and instead exult Jesus.
reject the doctrine of autonomy and instead submit ourselves to the God-ordained authorities in our lives, all the while rejecting the independent model that comes along with autonomy.
seek to discover the great God we serve, and worship Him alone with all our hearts, turning from the 24/7 entertainment culture.
limit our TV/Cinema time, and be very, very critical of that which we do watch.
enjoy sex within marriage, and give our children a good, God-honoring reason to wait.

If you will do these things as parents, and make a conscious decision to change the way in which you are raising your children so they too, will live these types of lives, your entire family will be as ready as you can be for whatever future God has for you in this country.

And on top of that, families like this will be lights for the Gospel that aren't hidden under the bushel of sordid American culture.....

The Atheists are Winning

2007-01-28T19:38:00.000-06:00

Dr. Albert Mohler, president of Southern Seminary, hosts a daily radio show. He always begins the show with commentary on current events. On 23 Jan 07 (Click here to listen), he discussed what a couple of secular people had written about Richard Dawkins' book, The God Delusion. One of those people is confirmed atheist Dr. Steven Weinberg, Nobel Laureate and professor of Physics and Astronomy at the University of Texas. He writes a critique of Dawkins' book in the The Times of London, stating the book didn't need to be written. Why not? ...because the atheists are already winning. The rationale he uses is that "Americans may look religious, may look like they believe in God, but when you actually peel back the surface and start to scratch underneath, you'll discover they don't know much about any belief in God." He also states, "Americans may claim to be Christians, but they have virtually no idea of what Christianity really is. Although most Americans may be sure of the value of religion, as far as I can tell, they're not very certain about the truth of what their own religion teaches." Mohler asks a question of himself, "What's my response to that?" His answer? "All too true."

As a dad, this is incredibly frightening in its implications, both for the world my children will enter as well as for their own souls. It is especially so since it is an observation from someone "outside the camp."

We have a "Christian" society (hey...some huge percentage identifies themselves that way) that is functionally atheist. They don't know Christian doctrine. They don't read their Bibles. They don't evangelize the lost. They don't live lives conformed to the commands of Scripture. They have a societally-based Christianity that adds the Christian faith to their secular world as one more separate piece. There are no absolutes. Multiculturalism and "diversity" reign in everything from schools to work to the marketplace. Absolute truth is nonexistent. Emotions and feelings rule the day, with a therapeutic worldview governing all our problems. Abortion...no problem. Divorce...hey, I have a right to be happy! Fornication...oh, that's such a judgmental word! Sodomy...it's only another kind of love! Exalting motherhood...that's SO patriarchal! Women in the military and dying on the battlefield...hey, there's no difference! And on and on. Sadly, many of these ideas and thoughts are present even in most evangelical circles.

This is the world into which our children will go...one where the only acceptable intolerance is toward a Bible-believing Christian, which is what we are hoping our children will be. Will they be ready for the onslaught? Will they be able to stand? Will they be a faithful witness to their Lord and Savior? Not unless they have been soundly saved and faithfully discipled before they go....

And what of their own souls? If the statistics are correct, 3 of 4 or 4 of 5 (depending on study) of our children will turn from their faith as young adults. If that happens, what good was all else that was done in childhood? The sports, the recreation, the academics, the vacations, the awards, the accolades... not an iota of any of it matters, because your child's soul is bound for hell. They MUST be discipled. You MUST be in their lives, teaching them the Word and living it before them. Your life MUST NOT show your faith as only a moral code. You MUST show them Christ in you! They MUST see a faith that is REAL, that causes you as the Dad (and the Mom) to form a family that honors and reveres the Word of God, living according to God's principles, precepts, patterns, and commands. (Here's one way to live it out.) They have to see it in action; otherwise, their finely-tuned "hypocrite detectors" will quickly see that your faith is a sham. That will set them up for any other system of thought that comes along once they are out of your home. They, too, will become a "Christian" who doesn't know Christ, and will ultimately hear those horrendous words from Jesus as they perish (see post on what it means to "perish"), "Depart from Me for I never knew you."

So now you're asking, "How?"

Dad....

Read your Bible in consistent quiet time. Pray Bible verses for your family and for each member by name. Expect God to answer those prayers according to the promises of His Word.

Apologize sincerely for not leading in devotions/worship previously. (I heard a statistic recently that Barna said less than 1 in 20 evangelical dads have ever led their family in devotions/worship!)

Read the Scriptures with your children, no matter how old...even if they roll their eyes and are sullen. Start with a "practical" book...say James, for example. Discuss what God is saying, (and then live it yourself!)

Have family worship, to include prayer...and maybe singing, if possible.

Don't give up. Do it every day; over the phone if you are traveling. Make it a priority in the day. Make it a family habit that is missed by all if skipped.

Do you want to help turn back the functional atheist tide? Do you want to start to lead your family? This is the place to start....

My prayer is for myself and for all dads who read this, that we will take up this challenge for the sake of our families and for the sake of the Gospel....

Joy!!!

2007-01-17T20:04:00.000-06:00

I was listening to the radio program of Kevin Swanson, the head of the Colorado Homeschool Association, as he interviewed Steve Maxwell on preparing sons to be single-income breadwinners. (Audio can be downloaded here, if you want to hear the whole program.) During that talk, Maxwell had a wonderful insight that applies to all of us, regardless of age or gender.

He said (paraphrased), "If our joy comes from entertainment, our joy is limited by income. But if our joy comes from serving others, we have the potential for a lifetime of joy."

I had never thought of it that way. But look at the truths embodied there. If our joy is in our stuff, or in our fun, or in our recreation, or in our travels, we can only have joy until the money runs out. So for many, you can have joy for two weeks of vacation a year or maybe for a time at Christmas when more stuff is accumulated along with the debt to pay for it! Now, how sad is that?!

But if we find our joy in serving others, there doesn't have to be money involved! The only thing necessary is us...and some time. As long as we have breath, we can serve others in some capacity, and if we have come to realize that service creates joy, then we have the ability to have joy throughout our entire lives.

So let's take it a bit farther and look at the implications:

1) If we are stepping out of the American Disney Rat Race for a life of joy in serving others in the Name of Christ, what does that say about us and more importantly, about the Lord we serve? What kind of witness do we have? I dare say...a HUGE witness! But one thing's for sure, it would take conviction...a conviction that our culture is absolutely wrong about where to find LASTING joy...and courage...courage to buck the culture (even the church culture) that would try to drag us back at every turn.

2) How much money is saved if we aren't spending it on stuff and entertainment that never seems to provide that lasting joy? What if it were spent on becoming debt-free? Or even better, on advancing the Kingdom of Christ? How much money would be freed up just in a few families alone? It's mind-boggling.

3) What would happen if we were to teach our children to find their joy in service instead of chasing Madison-Avenue-created "needs?" Would debt ever be the crippling issue it is for so many young adults? No. Would they (especially the young men) possibly have enough money to buy their first house debt-free at a very young age? Before you scoff: That's what both of the Maxwell sons did at age 21! Imagine the gift they bring to their marriage by providing their wife a home with no debt! Wow.

4) By serving others as ambassadors of Christ, we spread the Kingdom and bring Him glory... and we get joy. We would be doing the will of God, and we would find rest for our souls in the process.

This is a worthy idea, not just for each of us as parents, but as something we should seriously consider implementing in our lives so we are living examples as we teach our children the joy of service. We will all be better for it, for we would loose the chains of bondage to the next vacation or to the next trinket. Our children will be better for it because they will avoid that bondage altogether, learning from a young age where to find true and lasting joy: In our Heavenly Father and in His service. And because we are Christians, God will be glorified in our joy-seeking.

Discipling at Its Most Basic

2007-01-08T18:30:00.000-06:00

The fundamental purpose of this blog is to consider ideas about raising one's children in a manner where they are discipled as growing members of the body of Christ. I've written a lot about education, about social issues, about family unity, etc...but one thing I've neglected to write about (until now) is arguably the most important foundational principle: prayer.

Very little else will matter if we as dads are not on our knees in prayer for our entire family, interceding before the Throne of Grace for their souls, for their lives, for their growth in holiness, for their purity, for their protection from the world and its ways.... (not an exhaustive list, by any means).

So how do we do that? Our pastor always starts out the New Year with a sermon on prayer. (Should you want to listen to it, it can be found here.) This year our church offered a book with two sets of writings by John Bunyan regarding prayer. The first chapter alone is worth its weight in gold!

Bunyan defines true prayer as, "A sincere, sensible, affectionate pouring out of the heart or soul to God, through Christ, in the strength and assistance of the Holy Spirit, for such things as God has promised, or according to His Word, for the good of the church, with submission in faith to the will of God."

He then spends the rest of the chapter taking this apart. I hope to summarize that here.

Prayer that isn't sincere isn't heard by God. A sincere prayer comes from deep within the soul, encompassing the deepest of emotions and affections.

Prayer that is sensible is one that isn't "...a few babbling, prating, complimentary expressions...." but rather one that has a sense of mercy, either in the want of mercy, the gratefulness of mercy received, or of the readiness of God to give mercy.

Prayer that is affectionate is one that shows a deep longing for the things of God.

There is a pouring out of the heart or soul in that one's very life and strength are laid bare toward God.

Of course, this prayer must be to God and "...sees nothing substantial, and worth the looking after, but God."

Prayer absolutely must be through Christ, for otherwise it is simply eloquent speech.

Hand in hand with prayer being through Christ is by the strength or assistance of the Holy Spirit. If the Spirit isn't involved, it isn't reaching the ears of the Father.

Prayer MUST be for such things as God has promised. It has to fall within the "compass of God's Word" or it is at best vain babbling or possibly even blaspheme. I was listening to a sermon by John MacArthur where he dealt with this point. He advocated not using the phrase, "I pray this in Jesus' Name. Amen" but rather something to the effect of, "I pray this, believing that is the will of God in Christ. Amen" He said to put that phrase to the test. One quickly realizes that many of the things we pray for are questionable when it comes to the will of God.

Prayer MUST be for the good of the Church. Obviously God cares tremendously for the Church, for it is the bride of His Son purchased by the precious blood of the Son, Himself! Prayer needs to build up and purify the bride.

Prayer submits to the will of God. This is similar to the point above regarding for such things as God has promised. True prayer understands that our finite minds may not be able to make requests that are in line with God's will, so we will humbly and happily live with His answers...even if they aren't in line with our desires.

So consider how you pray for your children. How is your heart as you approach the Throne of Grace? Are you in Christ? Is the Spirit taking your prayers to the Father? Are you praying for such things as God has promised for your children? You must be in the Word to know what those things are! You can't just pray for the things of this world and for your own thoughts, hopes, and desires, thinking they line up with God's. Remember that your children are only on loan to you and God's primary desire involves their salvation and their sanctification. That is where your prayers should be centered. Beyond that, you could look to praying for the fulfillment of the roles God has given them. For example...if you are praying for your daughter to get an ROTC scholarship so she can be an officer in the Army...well...you won't be praying in God's will, for you would be hard-pressed to find any Biblical doctrine involving women in the military. You could pray for their Christian witness to the world, for the impact they might have on their circle of influence. The list could go on and on, but Bunyan has provided some excellent insight into how to pray in general, and it can easily be adapted into specific guidelines for praying for our children.

Be a praying Dad (or Mom), for your children desperately need your intercession for their salvation and growth in the Lord.

Out of the Office...

2006-12-19T22:22:00.001-06:00

Out on vacation...

Merry Christmas!!!

Gatto on Education

2006-12-15T19:29:00.000-06:00

John Taylor Gatto is a former New York City Teacher of the Year and a former New York State Teacher of the Year. He resigned in a spectacular fashion after 30 years of teaching and now writes and speaks against public education, based upon his extensive personal experience and upon intensive research into the history of our educational system. What follows is a quote from his book, A Different Kind of Teacher, and is very revealing about some of the assumptions we make about education. I would commend the entire book to you, but a word of caution is in order. Mr. Gatto admits he is not a Protestant. I suspect he may be Catholic. But regardless, he does not understand the Bible or the pursuit of holiness as one is sanctified. As such, he does not understand the Puritans, which he cites several times in the book. Take anything he says about the Puritans with a large grain of salt. Other than that, he is quite insightful into the state of our educational system today.

From Chapter 8:

I'll start off bluntly by giving you some data I'd be shocked if you already know. A few simple facts, all verifiable, which by their existence call into question the whole shaky edifice of American schooling from kindergarten through college and its questionable connection to the job market. The implications of this data are quite radical so I'm going to take pains to ground it in the most conservative society on earth, the mountain world of Switzerland. You all remember Switzerland: that's where people put their money when they really want it to be really safe.

The Swiss, just like us, believe that education is the key to their national success, but that's where our similarity ends. In 1990 about sixty percent of American secondary school graduates enrolled in college, but only twenty-two percent did in Switzerland; in America almost one hundred percent of our kids go to high school or private equivalents, but only a little over a fifth of the Swiss kids do. Any yet the Swiss per capita income is the highest of any nation in the world and the Swiss keep insisting that virtually everyone in their country is highly educated!

What on earth could be going on? Remember it's a sophisticated economy which produces the highest per-capita paycheck in the world we're talking about, high for the lightly-schooled as well as for the heavily-schooled, higher than Japan's, Germany's, or our own. No one goes to high school in Switzerland who doesn't also want to go to college; three-quarters of the young people enter apprenticeships before high school. It seems the Swiss don't make the mistake that schooling and education are synonyms.

If you are thinking silently at this point that apprenticeships as a substitute for classroom confinement isn't a very shocking idea and it has the drawback of locking kids away from later choice of white collar work, think again. I wasn't only talking about blue-collar apprenticeships--although the Swiss have those, too--but white-collar apprenticeships in abundance. Many of the top management of insurance companies, manufacturing companies, banks, etc., never saw the inside of a high school, let alone a college.

Shocking is the word for it, isn't it? I mean here you are putting away your loot in a Swiss bank because it's safe over there and not so safe here, and now I've told you the bank president may only have a sixth grade schooling! Just like Shakespeare did.

As long as we are playing "Did You Know?", did you know that in Sweden, a country legendary for its quality of life and a nation which beats American school performance in every academic category, a kid isn't allowed to start school before the age of seven? The hardheaded Swedes don't want to pay for the social pathologies attendant on taking a child away from his home and mother and dumping him into a pen with strangers. .... Did you know that the entire Swedish school sequence is only nine years long, a net twenty-five percent time and tax savings over our own....

Did you know that Hong Kong, a country with a population the size of Norway's, beats Japan in every scientific and mathematical category in which the two countries compete? Did you know that Hong Kong has a school year ten and one half weeks shorter than Japan's?

...Or did you know that in Flemish Belgium, with the shortest school year in the developed world, that the kids regularly finish in the top three nations in the world in academic competition?

These facts about the success of other nations' schooling systems should cause anyone reading this to start to seriously question what it is that we do and why we do it this way.

White-collar apprenticeships....
Short school years...
Shorter number of school years...

And yet all we ever hear from our "educators" is that our children need to spend more time in school in order to compete with these nations that spend less time in school! Isn't there a huge logical disconnect here???

Are you afraid to take your children out of the school systems because they won't be able to "compete?" If you have taken them out, are you afraid to let some of the curriculum go in order to disciple or minister the Gospel to others? I dare say that this short section from Gatto's book should encourage you that it is OK and your children will be fine...in fact, they will probably be better simply because of the time you spend doing something other than curriculum! Step out of the box; be creative!! You won't hurt your children, and they will love you for it!

Dr. Al Mohler on the Biblical Family

2006-12-04T15:38:00.000-06:00

Dr. R. Albert Mohler, President of Southern Seminary, recently preached a sermon at Southern Seminary's chapel regarding the Fifth Commandment: Honor thy father and thy mother. The entire sermon can be heard by clicking here. I commend the entire sermon to you, but in particular I'd like to address a particular quote. Dr. Mohler says:

"The Biblical vision is of father and mother and children. The Biblical vision is of the father taking the lead for a transgenerational vision for his family. One of the problems even in many Christian homes today is that parents see their responsibility to get children from infancy to graduation from college. And our job is done. That's the horizon of our responsibility. But the Biblical vision is of the father taking responsibility not merely for his children, but for his children's children, and for his children's children's children. The lack of that vision explains why so much of our church ministry related to families is so thin, and so superficial, and so ineffective."

First note that he says the Biblical vision is of a "father and mother and children." That, combined with the next statement about a transgenerational vision, leads me to conclude that my earlier thoughts on individuality are valid (here and here). The normative Biblical vision is of families; families growing together, families ministering together, families evangelizing together. The notion of the rugged individualist is anything but the norm. So...are we raising our children with a family identity, or with a vision for individualism?

Secondly, Dr. Mohler makes it very clear that the father is supposed to take the lead in developing a vision for his family that extends far into future generations. This doesn't happen in the evangelical church today. Why? For the most part, it isn't even considered! Christian families just go with the flow of the culture, training up their children as individuals and looking forward to the empty nest without ever giving a thought to any vision, but especially not to a multigenerational vision! In addition, the thought of a father leading in developing a multigenerational vision goes against the grain of the entrenched evangelical feminism that crawls invisibly under the surface of most of our assumptions about the world.

Thirdly, Dr. Mohler takes us to task about the short-sighted view we have of the parental responsibility. He says we view success as getting our children through college and out on their own as individuals, at which time we enjoy our golden years as individual empty nesters. Not so. When a family has a multigenerational outlook, the family continues to grow around the patriarch and matriarch. Their vision passes down through the generations. The family enlarges and becomes a force to reckon with within their sphere of influence...not from a political or violent point of view, but rather from a loving, Christ-honoring, service point of view. They will be a very, very different entity in our culture, and as such will bear incredibly strong witness to the saving, life-changing Gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ.

And lastly, Dr. Mohler says this explains why the children's ministry and youth ministry in our churches today are so worthless...with more than three-quarters of our youth turning from their faith in young-adulthood. Families ARE the best youth ministry!

...especially families with vision!

From the Heart

2006-11-19T14:28:00.000-06:00

I wrote a "from the heart" note on my Get Serious blog that would apply here...so please do me the favor of clicking here and reading it.

Moralistic vs. God-Centered

2006-11-12T18:47:00.000-06:00

I was listening to a podcast version of The Albert Mohler Program (link on the left), and the topic was "Youth Ministry." One of his guests made a phenomenal distinction that I thought was worthy of some consideration here.

He said (paraphrasing), "Most of what we do in the church today with young people results in 'moralistic' adults instead of 'God-centered' adults."

That's huge.

Recognize what is at stake here. A person who is "moralistic" is a person who lives by a set of rules that most would consider "moral," which means they probably have their basis in the Bible. That person IS NOT SAVED!!!! He will be a very nice person, and he may very well attend church on a regular basis since that is part of his "moral" rulebook. But he does not know Christ. Dr. Mohler stated that so many youth ministries have only two real points: Come to church and don't have sex until marriage. This results in a moralistic outlook on life, and could very well be why 75-88% of evangelical young people walk away from the faith in their early twenties.

How tragic.

What we really want are young people who know Christ, who are radically God-centered, who take the demands of the Gospel and run with them with all their heart. This results in young people who are mature both in their faith and in their countenance. They aren't going to be what the Harris brothers on their Rebelution Blog call "Kidults." They are ready to rise up and take on adult responsibilities early. They recognize the narcissistic, fun-oriented teen culture for the vacuous waste of time it is.

So how do we parent our own children so they are God-centered and not just moralistic? Discipleship!!! By whom? By the parents, with Dad taking the lead. They need to learn their Bibles, learn doctrine and apply it to their own lives, learn at an early age that, if they are indeed born-again, their lives are not their own because they have been bought with the priceless blood of the Lamb. (And if they aren't born again...That MUST be the focus, for the rest is for naught without it. That is exactly what leads to moralism.) They must learn at an early age the necessity of growing in Christ through the obedience to God's commands. They must learn to be different from the culture around them, and understand that difference is GOOD! They must learn to love the people with whom they come into contact. They must learn to focus on the good of others above their own pleasure.

These are all examples of things that would happen as a young person matures in the faith at the feet of parental discipleship. Of course, it's not an exhaustive list...but it's a start! What kind of impact on our world would a large group of on-fire Christian young adults have if they had matured in this manner? It boggles the mind with possibility!

Praying for God-centeredness in our children....

Destiny and Its Impact

2006-10-25T21:40:00.000-05:00

A post at another blog I frequent got me to thinking about overarching themes that can help a family grow together with proper focus and direction. The biggest theme that came to mind was to have a sense of destiny. I'm afraid the families of our day think far too small; they can't see past today or this week. A family with long-term vision is one who looks ahead to empty nest!

How sad.

Destiny. That's a loaded word. The dictionary defines it as "a predetermined course of events, often held to be an irresistible power or agency." Of course, they don't mention the "irresistible power or agency" as being the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob! So what is it that God has in mind for you, for me? What is it He has in mind for our families? Do we travel down the path of life with a fatalistic outlook because we acknowledge the sovereignty of God? I think not.

First and foremost is that, if we are adopted sons and daughters of the King, then what He has in mind for us is beyond our wildest dreams. Secondly, we were saved in order to accomplish good works that had been preordained for us (Ephesians 2). A good work has consequences and impact beyond us and possibly beyond anything we could imagine.

So do we just "let it happen?" How can we get a sense of the destiny God has for us? The obvious destiny is to be conformed to the likeness of Christ and to reside in heaven for eternity joyously worshipping the infinite God. That is arguably the most important "destiny!!"

But personally, when I think of "destiny," I guess I am not thinking of exactly the dictionary definition, but rather, I tend to think of impact. What will be the impact of my family and me on the world? Destiny implies vision. As stated earlier, it isn't a small, short-sighted vision. A vision of destiny looks down through the generations to what might be and to what influence we as a family might have on hundreds or thousands of people to come. Just do a little research on the progeny of Jonathan Edwards or Susanna Wesley and see the impact of one godly family!

Properly envisioned and articulated, this is a concept that will bring about a shared sense of mission within the family. A shared sense of mission will unite us to one another under the headship of the father who is under the headship of Christ with the purpose of Kingdom impact. This sense of mission will focus everyone on something much bigger than themselves. What a radical concept for children and young adults! This also produces a byproduct of a sense of belonging, of groundedness, of definition. Gone would be the wonderings of our young people as they search near and yon for who they are and what they are here for. They have a family destiny: both to impact the world as a part of a family, and to carry on the family legacy and destiny into the succeeding generations.

True Christian Destiny: Ultimately preordained good works as we are conformed to the likeness of our Savior enroute to a joyous eternity in the presence of the Father.

Sense of destiny--> Long-term vision for Kingdom impact
Long-term vision for Kingdom impact--> Sense of shared mission
Sense of shared mission--> Family cohesiveness through shared outward focus
Family cohesiveness--> Sense of belonging
Sense of belonging--> Love for one another and for the lost of the world

May we all develop a sense of destiny with a long-term vision of hundreds of years! And may the Lord use this to spread His Kingdom far and wide for His glory and for our joy!

The Myth of Adolescence

2006-10-20T14:04:00.000-05:00

In line with my previous post on how one church is dealing with "teen," I came across two wonderful articles written by Alex and Brett Harris (younger brothers of Joshua Harris, if you happen to recognize his name as the author of "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" fame). The Harris brothers have a blog and a ministry that intends to spark young people out of the doldrums of "adolescence" and into adult involvement in their world.

They write, "Our world cannot last another generation of Christian young people who fit in." (emphasis mine)

Read part one of five here, and then link from there to parts 2-5 (links at the bottom of each post). And while you are at it, bookmark the blog for your apprenticing adults!!!

Praying for young people not to fit in....

How One Chruch Does "Teen"

2006-10-19T17:07:00.000-05:00

For any who have done much research in the area, you can quickly discover that the idea of adolescence is a relatively new concept. In fact, the word "teenager" didn't exist a century ago. And the whole idea of "teenage rebellion" is one that would be foreign to our forefathers because there was no such thing as a "teenager." As one matured, he simply moved into adult responsibilities. How else do you explain the phenomenal accomplishments of young people in the 1700's? Jonathan Edwards was a college president around age 20. I believe it was John Quincy Adams who was a United States Ambassador at age 14! And there were others, but their names don't come to mind right now.

I believe a whole host of our societal problems come from the whole idea of "teenager" and "teenage rebellion" What can we do about it? For one, we as families can endeavor to raise children who love the Lord with all their heart, soul, mind, and strength...who walk humbly with Him as their God... and who love their neighbor as themselves. These are people who will change the world in which they live.

What about our churches? How can they hinder or help?

Most of what passes for ministry to children and young people today is patterned after the evolutionary theories that brought us age-segregated public schooling...and that's not a good thing. This is especially true when it comes to the teen years when enabling young people to focus solely on themselves and on each other only leads to questionable salvation and to extended adolescence. These young people enter adulthood woefully unprepared to actually BE adults.

There are several movements afoot that attempt to address this problem. Here is what our particular church is doing:

We no longer have a children's department, nor do we have a youth department. Instead, the whole thing is now the Family Discipleship Department and it endeavors to work with parents and to help them raise children in the fear and admonition of the Lord. There is a seamless curriculum that runs from preschool to eighth grade that brings the children deeper and deeper into God's Word and good doctrine. They realize that we aren't playing games here, nor are we babysitting. That part is wholly in position already and is working nicely. The next step is to radically reform what used to be the youth department. The vision right now is to even change the verbiage...no more "youth;" no more "teenager." Instead something along the lines of "apprentice adult" would be used (that's not set in stone...just an idea that reflects the concept that what we call someone affects both how they perceive themselves and how they are perceived by others). The apprentice adults (ninth grade and up) would be expected to join in with adult activities and ministries, both in terms of learning in Sunday Schools and volunteering their time in ministry. They would be shepherded and mentored (hopefully by their parents) and encouraged about growing quickly into adulthood and assuming adult responsibilities. They would be encouraged to put off the childish things of the world in favor of the more exciting things of adulthood. The idea that your 20s is a time of sowing your oats and having a time of grand fun while you are single before being "tied down" to marriage would be anathematized.

In short, they would be expected to grow up.

And of course, all of this assumes an education of the parents and other adults in the church so they understand their responsibilities in helping these apprentice adults learn and grow. They are to provide example and opportunity. They are to mentor and shepherd. This can't happen in a vacuum; it will require a paradigm change on the part of the adults of the church.

Not a bad idea at all....

Praying that more parents and churches would come to understand this vision.

Dominion Mandate and the Family

2006-10-02T22:38:00.000-05:00

In my other blog, I posted some thoughts on living life with the Dominion Mandate as the "big picture." One of the implications I raised was how that might affect the decisions we make on both family relations and on the raising of children.

Genesis 1:26-29 outlines the Dominion Mandate, occurring before the Fall and not rescinded to this day.

Note first that the Mandate is given to "them"...both the man and the woman, together. Next note that the first part of the Mandate is to be fruitful and multiply...build a family. It can be inferred that taking dominion, and thus building the Kingdom, is something families ought to be working toward together.

If the Dominion Mandate truly applies to families, then it provides a basis for the direction of the family unit. As such, children need to know from an early age that they are part of a family on a mission...a mission to impact their portion of the world as a family. They need to be raised with an outward focus of Christ-exalting, world-changing vision rather than the pagan focus of self.

In effect, the Dominion Mandate provides a framework for a family vision for each and every Christian family. We are not here by accident; we as members of a particular family are sovereignly put here. And God has given us a direction...a direction that is significantly different from that of the pagan world: be fruitful, multiply, fill the world, take dominion. I believe it could be argued that taking dominion includes bringing the Word of God to bear on everything that we as Christians do, from our personal lives, to our family lives, to our work, to our worship, to our recreation, to our relationships... everything! In doing so, we will be advancing the Kingdom by showing a real witness of Christ's changing power in our lives.

This also relates a bit to the two posts on individualism (here and here). If the conclusion in the earlier paragraph is true, that the Dominion Mandate applies to families, then we need to take that to heart AS families and quit acting like the world by playing the rugged individualists who just happen to share a name and a roof. You don't take dominion by sending out individuals from a family, you take dominion by sending into the world families who honor Christ in all they do. The recurring theme is that Christian witness must be more than words; it must be lives that are lived out under the auspices of the Bible in the power of the Holy Spirit. It is that distinctiveness that will witness Christ to the world...and there will be two responses: persecution, or they will listen. And as more listen, the Kingdom is spread...and dominion occurs.

Praying for dominion-minded families....

Spurgeon on Raising Children

2006-09-30T00:18:00.000-05:00

While I like to use this blog as a place to record and flesh out my own thoughts and ideas, I came across on Scott Brown's blog an incredible quote from the Prince of Preachers, Charles Spurgeon, on the raising of children. With his usual direct style, he makes very clear the priorities Christian parents should be having when raising children...and for that, he would probably be considered "radical" in today's world. Note also how he pulled no punches in the last paragraph in describing particular parents who aren't heeding his wisdom. That, too, would be considered "judgmental" in today's evangelical world.... But could it be that the very thing Spurgeon is warning against is exactly why over 75% of our evangelical young adults are walking away from the faith by their early 20s (Southern Baptist Convention stats)?

“It is very grievous to see how some professedly Christian parents are satisfied so long as their children display cleverness in learning, or sharpness in business, although they show no signs of a renewed nature. If they pass their examinations with credit and promise to be well fitted for the world's battle, their parents forget that there is a superior conflict, involving a higher crown, for which the child will need to be fitted by divine grace and armed with the whole armor of God. Alas, if our children lose the crown of life, it will be but a small consolation that they have won the laurels of literature or art.

Many who ought to know better think themselves superlatively blessed in their children if they become rich, if they marry well, if they strike up into profitable enterprises in trade, or if they attain eminence in the profession which they have espoused. Their parents will go to their beds rejoicing and awake perfectly satisfied, though their boys are hastening down to hell, if they are also making money by the bushel. They have no greater joy than their children are having their portion in this life and laying up treasure where rust corrupts it. Though neither their sons nor daughters show any signs of the new birth, give no evidence of being rich toward God, manifest no traces of electing love, or redeeming grace or the regenerating power of the Holy Spirit, yet there are parents who are content with their condition.

Now, I can say of such professing parents that they have need to question whether they be Christians at all and if they will not question it themselves, they must give some of us leave to hold it in serious debate.

From a sermon, “The Parent’s and Pastors Joy”

Oh, that we could have more "radical" preachers...and more parents who would heed them....

Where's Your Identity?

2006-09-28T17:48:00.000-05:00

In the previoius post, "Implications of Individualism," I used an example from Dr. R.C. Sproul, Sr. wherein he spoke of teaching his children the value of their membership in his family...that the Sproul family was their identity. Now, knowing how much Dr. Sproul understands and values the majesty, supremacy, and sovereignty of God, I know he cannot be discounting the fact that a Christian's identity is in Christ.

So as I mused over what I had written, I couldn't get past the thought of a person finding his identity in his family being at odds with a person finding his identity in Christ. But as I thought further about the quandry, I believe that it can be answered because God is sovereign in placing a person in a particular family. None of us is in our family (either of origin or of marriage) by accident. God has sovereignly ordained that you be there.

I can see a few scenerios playing out:

One is that you are not a Christian and not from a Christian family. In this case, the whole discussion is meaningless because you would be finding your identity just as the culture does...in yourself.

Another is that you are a unregenerate child in a Christian family. There is no problem with the family encouraging you to find your identity within the family. And if by the mercies of God you become regenerate, then melding an identity in Christ with an identity of a Godly family should not be an issue.

And lastly, you are a new believer in an unregenerate family. Your new identity is in Christ, but there is probably not a family identity anyway...nor will there be unless the family comes to faith in Christ. So the family identity is a nonissue here.

So in the long run, a Christian who finds his identity in his God-fearing family is not at odds with his finding his identity in Christ.

Implications of Individualism

2006-09-28T10:04:00.000-05:00

Over at my Get Serious blog, I wrote a piece about individualism and it's impact on America, both in the family and in the community. The foundation for the argument rests upon the family and how its members see themselves in relation to it. As such, there are implications for our children and how we raise them.

In our culture we raise our children with the ultimate vision of sending them off to make their own way in the world, independent of their family. The children know this, and anticipate that day of emancipation. If you were to ask "Johnny" who he is, he would reply, "I am Johnny." followed by a quizzical look as to why you wouldn't understand that. This reply shows that he has been fully inculcated with the concept of individualism: the world begins and ends with him.

The result is that our culture is full of a bunch of individuals, each doing his own thing in his own direction for his own satisfaction. In some sense, this results in a culture of success...monetary, standard of living, etc. But in a darker sense, it results in a culture that doesn't connect with each other. Everything from the culture of success is temporal; it is only relationships that will last eternally, and even then, only those relationships between people for whom Christ is their Lord and Savior.

I once heard R.C. Sproul, Sr. discussing the issue of family and how children related to it. He pointed out that in the Sproul family, the children were taught at the youngest age that when asked what their name was, they were to give it. But when asked who they were, the answer was "I am a Sproul." They would then follow it up with "A Sproul does (a list of what the family values were)." Note the difference between what a child's name is and who they are. Dr. Sproul taught his children that their identity was in their membership in the Sproul family and that the Sproul family had a direction and a destiny...and they were a part of it! This is what's missing in most every American family today. The sad part is that it is missing in the families who claim to be evangelicals as well.

If we are to reclaim Christian witness as well as our families, then we must change the direction of our families, and by implication, the way we raise our children. The Sproul example points out two items that have to happen if our families are to become unified points of light for the Kingdom: 1) There must be a vision; a discernible, defined direction for the family, and 2) the members of the family MUST come to understand they are not just (for example) Johnny and Susie and Joe and Pam...but that they are "Stewarts" and as such, bring their own gifts to the Stewart family in order to further the family vision.

A unified family that is focused on a Godly vision is a force to contend with when it comes to spreading the Kingdom and witnessing God's grace to the world. Now just imagine what it would be like to have groups of these types of families all together in a church! What a glorious witness that would be, and what a joy it would be to be a part of such a relationship-driven Christian community!

But it all starts with the individual family and how its members see themselves....

What Exactly IS Education?

2006-09-19T12:43:00.000-05:00

What does it mean to be “educated?” Most in today’s world answer this question by saying an “educated” person has taken the classes prescribed by a schooling institution and preferably finishes with at least a four-year degree. Our society seems to equate having a piece of paper from a four-year institution with qualifying a person as “educated.” But are they? Really?

I would challenge you to take a look at your own “education” as I look at mine. I graduated from my high school as valedictorian. I went on to get a four-year degree in Electrical Engineering from a reasonably good engineering school. So I guess I’m “educated.” At middle age, I would look back at my own personal experience and ask, “What do I actually remember from the classes that made me ‘educated’?” The bottom line is that if the information is retained only long enough to pass a test, then you really haven’t learned it; you’ve only been exposed to it. In math, I am incapable of doing anything beyond Algebra II without restudying and relearning it. This is in spite of having enough advanced math in college for math to qualify as a minor! How about Chemistry? I had an honors Chemistry class my freshman year. I could not have told you anything of substance about Chemistry within a year of completion of that class. How about all the EE specialty classes I took? None. Nothing. Nada. There is absolutely nothing remaining in my brain from those classes, and I can realistically say that there was little or nothing remaining within a year of completing those classes either.

I truly believe that I am not alone here. Unless a person becomes involved in his field, and thus immerses himself in the subject (there’s the key, folks!), it will not last. And anything that does not last wasn’t really learned in the first place. How many of your children have taken more than a year of foreign language? Have you asked them to speak it to you a year later? Or read it? Or write it? I’m willing to bet the normal child will be unable to do much more than a couple of words. (Hey, I was in Spanish Honor Society and took two years of Spanish in High School…but within a year could only count to 30 and say a few short phrases at best.)

So how does this apply to the education of our children? How did the children of the 1700s learn? They didn’t have scope and sequences. They didn’t have “professionals” to teach them. And yet the literacy rate of America in the 1700s was well over 90%! How could that be? That’s especially telling when you consider that the functional literacy rate of today’s America is around 85% (according to Wikipedia,) in spite of the enormous sums spent to “educate” our populace. And even more critical is that the average person living in the 1700s could run rings around most of us in virtually any subject outside of modern science and technology. Why? How were they educated?

John Taylor Gatto (not a Christian, that I can tell), former NYC and NY State Teacher of the Year, describes the colonial era education model as one where a child was taught the basics of reading and writing, and then allowed/encouraged to pursue his interests as far as they would take him by reading, apprenticing, interacting, debating…and then moving on to the next interest. This provided a person with an in-depth, thoughtful exposure to a subject that was meaningful to the person at the time…which then results in real learning: retention with the ability to apply, discuss, and debate what was learned. Great men like George Washington, Thomas Edison, and Ben Franklin all learned this way (Gatto profiles each them in his book, “The Underground History of American Education). And I believe this is more of the format that is used for learning at the PhD levels of higher education today. So why does one have to go that far in his journey of learning to get to a place where he can learn in this manner??? But I digress....

Back to the "key" mentioned above: My own personal example is when I finally got to USAF Pilot Training. I was in love with becoming a pilot. I dreamed about it. Every waking moment it was not far from my mind. And because of this intense interest, as well as the absolute focus of the training, I did well...and to this day can speak of details of the airplane I flew over twenty years ago, to include its aerodynamic specifics and entry speeds for various aerobatics. A second example is the Bible. Upon becoming a Christian, my interest in the Bible skyrocketed. As such, I don't chafe at learning theology...I embrace it. And by immersing myself in specific classes over time, reading good books, and discussing/debating with other Christians, I have learned a lot about the theology...and have retained it!

We in America don't educate our children that way, even as homeschoolers. Instead, we model our homeschools like a public school, with scope and sequences and hopping from one subject to another to ensure that “they don’t get behind.” (Behind "what" is never addressed.) As a result, our children never become masters at anything, but rather shallowly exposed to many things. That homeschooled children do better than their public schooled counterparts is mostly due to the effects of individual tutoring.

So maybe what we take for granted as defining an "educated" person isn't really accurate. Maybe we as parents would do well to take some quiet time and muse over what "education" actually is...even more importantly, maybe we should study our Bibles and let God inform us as to what He considers to be important. Then maybe we should wrestle with this definition and with what God shows us, discussing it with our spouses...and then most importantly, we should apply it to the raising of our children.

My guess is that the result of such an exercise will be something quite countercultural, but something that will result in children who are raised to contend for the Kingdom and who are well on their way to having the mind of Christ. That's the sort of child who will be an adult who actually impacts his culture for Christ instead of adapting to it.

Let's pray for impact!!!

[Update Oct 3, 2006... An example of impact!! I have begun reading "The Pursuit of God" by A.W. Tozer. The preface gives a profile of his life. It turns out that Tozer attended neither high school nor college! He wasn't homeschooled either. Instead, he was a voracious reader. And (to quote the preface), "With no teacher but the Holy Spirit and good books, A.W. Tozer became a theologian, a scholar, and a master craftsman in the use of the English language." He ultimately became a Godly pastor and an author whose writings have allowed millions to draw nearer to God. Now that is impact we could pray to see more often!]

Vacation and Brain Freeze

2006-08-06T22:07:00.000-05:00

Well...
Go on vacation...
Have a great time...
Don't post for a while...

And watch your brain freeze up for topics!

Do We Believe?

2006-07-02T18:57:00.000-05:00

As I pondered the post answering the last question in the "Gifts or Idols" series, I couldn't shake the feeling that we as Christians don't consider the reality of the doctrine of hell, and are thus less than motivated when it comes to evangelism or, more to the point here, the discipling of our children. We are thus willing to follow the ways of the culture and to think that our children won't be part of the over 75% who turn their backs on their faith once out from under the roof of their parents.

So I decided to write more on the topic of hell over at my other blog, "Rise Up and Get Serious," since the question has application far outside the realm of child-rearing.

May we all grasp the doctrine of eternal punishment with more gravity, and may that give us the courage to challenge the culture for the sake of our children's souls.

Gifts or Idols? Part VII

2006-06-29T20:15:00.000-05:00

Question #7 from the post that started this series asks, "Could the answers to these questions also have anything to do with the huge number of young adults raised in Evangelical Christian homes walking away from their faith?"

Really, this is the bottom line of all our efforts at parenting, isn't it? If our children are successful at everything the world offers them, yet walk away from the faith because they don't know Christ Jesus...then we have failed. Exactly what good is it for them to gain the whole world, and yet lose their souls? (Yes, I am fully aware of the implications of Reformed Theology and that God must be the One Who changes their heart. But our part in the equation is to acquaint them with Jesus, both through word and through action. We are to disciple them!)

If you took the time to listen to the sermon by Voddie Baucham as linked in my earlier post you will hear him delineate the problem just within the 16-million-member Southern Baptist Convention. And if it's a problem there...well...you can guarantee it's a bigger problem almost everywhere else. Pastor Baucham points out statistical surveys have shown that between 75% and 88% of SBC young people (depending on the particular survey) walk away from their faith by the end of their first year in college. THAT ought to frighten every true Christian parent down to the depth of their souls. The implications of that are that at least three out of every four of our sons and daughters are destined for an eternity of horror in hell unless God intervenes later in their lives...something that other surveys show isn't all that likely. (Of course, I am not about to constrain God's actions by surveys...but currently there are very, very few adults who turn their lives over to Christ, which indicates that here in America, God doesn't often move in the hearts of adults as compared to the hearts of young people.)

True Christian parents understand the depths and horrors of hell, and to contemplate even for a minute that their children might be destined for an eternity in hell should shock them out of their societal mindset and cause them to give considerable thought to what part they should be playing in giving their children every possible opportunity to embrace Christ in all His glory.

Dads...you are responsible for this discipleship and you cannot hand it off to anyone else, including youth groups and Christian schools (although certainly your wife, your helpmeet, can stand in your stead when you aren't available...but overall, it's still your responsibility). Ephesians 6:4 says, "Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." Psalm 78:1-8 says, "Give ear, O my people, to my teaching; incline your ears to the words of my mouth! 2 I will open my mouth in a parable; I will utter dark sayings from of old, 3 things that we have heard and known, that our fathers have told us. 4 We will not hide them from their children, but tell to the coming generation the glorious deeds of the Lord, and his might, and the wonders that he has done. 5 He established a testimony in Jacob and appointed a law in Israel, which he commanded our fathers to teach to their children, 6 that the next generation might know them, the children yet unborn, and arise and tell them to their children, 7 so that they should set their hope in God and not forget the works of God, but keep his commandments; 8 and that they should not be like their fathers, a stubborn and rebellious generation, a generation whose heart was not steadfast, whose spirit was not faithful to God."

Over and over again we see the example of generations of Israelites falling away from God in spite of the previous generation being close to God. What is the lesson? The older generation didn't pass down the faith, they didn't tell of God's wondrous deeds. Psalm 78 tells us twice that the fathers are supposed to do this, and it also illustrates why: "...so that they should set their hope in God...."

If there is to be any hope for our children, we as parents...and especially dads...must disciple our children. We must consider why we do the things we do when we are raising them. We must not just go along with raising them according to the culture of the day...even according to the Evangelical culture (with a 75% failure rate...why in the world should we even consider doing what they do?????).

Please...parents...please turn your eyes to eternity and consider your children. Please look critically at what our culture is saying about how to raise our children and what it means to "be successful." Please have the strength to rise up and "buck" the culture...for the sake of your children and their eternal souls. Please don't define success in worldly terms; define it in "Christ-like" terms. Again...what does it prosper a man to gain the whole world, and yet lose his soul?

Or more to the point here, what does it prosper a parent to raise a child who is successful in the world, and yet lose his soul for eternity?

Gifts or Idols? Part VI

2006-06-29T00:07:00.000-05:00

Ahh...finally back to the "Gifts or Idols" questions!

Question number six from my earlier post asked, "Could the answers to these questions have something to do with why today's teens and young adults are so self-centered?"

I think that by simply reading the previous answers I have posted, the answer to this question is pretty clear: Yes!

What are the most common answers to the previous questions? I'll review and summarize them here.

1) Our focus as parents is typically on the children as the primary emphasis of the home.
2) We are raising our children "to be successful" instead of "to be like Christ."
3) Our parenting methodology is to focus our entire lives on our children, giving them every opportunity possible, all the while subordinating any other family responsibilities to these opportunities.
4) Because of the previous three answers, our children learn that the world revolves around them and they come to believe that is right and proper.
5) And of course, we want to ensure that we have built good self-esteem in the children and that they feel good about themselves. In other words, they are again told they are the most important thing in the world.

And then we wonder why teens and young adults are so focused on self, why they are unable/unwilling to give the time of day to people outside of their little peer group. After all, it's all about them...that's what they've been taught through the actions of their parents and society all through their lives. Far be it for the typical teen (especially the "cool" ones) to give the time of day to a child or to an adult. Far be it for them to give of themselves to serve another. After all, it's all about them, and serving isn't fun!

And then they are asked to grow up and take responsibility...and that doesn't sit so well either. As Dr. Albert Mohler (link on the left) states so often, we have a crisis of extended adolescence, of young men well into their 20s who should be doing adult things and contributing to society instead still living with their parents and avoiding all the responsibilities of adult life. That certainly isn't the type of man any sane parent wants for a son-in-law!

So, as parents, if we want to see our teens/young adults modeling Christ-like behavior rather than the typical self-centered hubris we see in most, we need to do something different. We need to be discipling our children such that they learn their true position in this world: that of a sinner, yet created by God, loved enough to have God's Son die for their sin, and now expected to put full faith and trust in Jesus and to grow in likeness to Him...and that likeness is anything but what is seen in today's young society.

But even scarier than the character defects and societal implications of Question #6 is the answer to Question #7....

Desiring God National Conference

2006-06-28T23:49:00.000-05:00

Funny how I just heard of Voddie Baucham from a different source...and here I find him as one of the featured speakers at the Desiring God 2006 National Conference.

If you haven't marked your calendar for this conference, do so now! You won't be sorry. September 29 - October 1, 2006 in Minneapolis, MN.

Closing the Generational Gap

2006-06-17T18:42:00.000-05:00

According to statistics from the Southern Baptist Convention, over 75% of our children are turning their backs on their faith by the end of their first year in college. Statistically, Americans (and that includes evangelical Christians) are having fewer children than are required for replacing the population...only 1.9. That means that it will take two evangelical families to produce a single Christian in the next generation. And of course, that doesn't even consider that three souls from Christian families are destined for an eternity in Hell....

Concerned? Then I plead with you to take the time to listen to this wonderful sermon posted online. Unfortunately, you can't download it...only listen online. You will be challenged and convicted about our children's eternal future and what we should be doing about it.

I have to give credit for finding this sermon link posted at Scott Brown's blog (see link on left). I had never heard of Voddie Baucham, but he is an elder at Grace Family Baptist Church (Southern Baptist Convention) in Houston, Texas and delivered this wonderful address at a Texas Baptist Evangelism Conference.

It's available to hear (but not download) at:

Closing the Generational Gap

Scroll through the sermons listed until you find Pastor Baucham's.

You can purchase Pastor Baucham's sermons at:

VoddieBaucham.com

Enjoy...and be convicted!!! And then do something about that conviction!

Gifts or Idols? Part V

2006-06-16T18:00:00.000-05:00

Question #5 from my earlier post asks, "How important is your child's self-esteem?"

It seems that is all we hear about lately: self-esteem, as if it were the nexus of what it means to be emotionally healthy. Everything we read tells us to build up little Johnny's and little Jenny's self-esteem. So we put them in sports. When they play in a sport such as soccer, there really will be no losers because everybody gets a trophy. Our kids end up with rooms full of trophies that don't mean anything because they didn't come from succeeding, but only from participating! Is that really building up their self-esteem? Does self-esteem even really matter?

In some respects, I would say the answer is, "yes, it matters." But the trick is how that self-esteem is built. If it is built by the awarding of "fake" trophies, by giving praise that isn't warranted, or by false "success," then it is not even worth considering because the person has to know deep in his heart that there are no grounds for the accolades. (And then he gets the normal evolutionary clap-trap in his group school about how he was just a cosmic accident, a descendant of apes. So he knows he has no grounds for his accolades and he believes he is a cosmic accident...and yes he is supposed to feel good about himself. Hmmmm.....)

Instead, it should be built by a right relationship with the child's Creator. By right relationship, I mean an understanding that his worth comes not from kicking a ball into a net or scoring against an opponent. It comes not even from such worthy things as good academics or great talent at music. It comes from understanding that his Creator knew him before the foundation of time; that He knew him in his mother's womb where He personally knit him together. It comes from knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that he is made in the image of the one and only living God, the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob!

And it comes from a right relationship with that one and only God...by having repented of his sin and turned in hope to that one and only God's Son, Jesus Christ. The understanding of the love that Christ showed on the cross and that God showed by sending His Son to that cross brings self-worth and self-esteem into proper focus...a focus not on self, but on the One who created you and who died that you may live. The focus is outward, not inward. "I am not worthy, yet God did this wonderful thing anyway, that I might be reconciled to Him. Praise His Name!!!"

That is self-esteem, and that will help your child grow in maturity and proper outlook on life. And it will put the accolades from all other successes in proper perspective: activities, abilities, and awards don't define your child; God defines your child through His Son.

Gifts or Idols? Part IV

2006-06-11T23:34:00.000-05:00

Question #4 from my earlier post asked, "By our parenting methodology, where do our children learn to focus?"

This one hits hard at a cherished American cultural child-raising tradition. This particular tradition, though, is only a generation or so old. What might that child-raising tradition be? It is the idolatry of children.

Oh, but wait! I don't make idols out of my children! I am just giving them every opportunity so they will be well-rounded and find themselves.

We couch this idolatry in the language of "opportunity" and creating "successful" children. The painful reality, though is that it makes the children become idols. We as parents (and yes, I'm guilty here, too) load up our schedules to the bursting point with activities for the kids. Soccer, music lessons, baseball, band, dance, karate, church, youth group, and on and on and on and on. We want to make sure little junior isn't left behind. After all, if he might want to play ball at the varsity level in high school, he has to start in PeeWee before kindergarten! Otherwise he won't be good enough!

We sacrifice family unity and family time at the altar of activity. It takes very little time for the children to realize that the world as they know it revolves around them and their schedule. Mom and Dad jump at every notice of a game or practice. Mom and Dad sacrifice their schedules for those of the kids. What is the unspoken message that gets communicated here?

I dare say it is that the kids are the most important thing in the household. All eyes are upon them. Everything that happens in the household depends upon them.

And to answer question #4...where do they learn to focus? Why on themselves and their own personal happiness, of course!

And then we wonder why they are so self-centered as teens, why they don't look outside themselves and their peer group. Could it be that all those years of focusing of them has taught them well, taught them to focus on themselves? (OK...leaped a little here into Question #6.)

I know this sounds harsh. Shouldn't a parent focus on his child? Absolutely. The question though becomes one of methodology.

If you focus on the child the way we tend to do in today's society, then the result discussed above will be the most common result. On the other hand, if the focus is on discipling the child in the ways of God and learning well the Second Greatest Commandment, to love our neighbors as ourselves, then the child learns that he is there to serve others in the name of Christ. He learns the joy of service, of putting others before himself. He learns that his Creator is pleased when he looks outside himself in the power of the Holy Spirit.

So rather than giving our children as many "experiences" as possible, let's disciple them instead. So they don't make the high school varsity baseball team. Does it really matter? Does it really matter if instead, they are fine, mature, godly young men and women who are impacting their own teen culture with their witness of service? Which is God more concerned about? How many teams they were on and how well they played...or what their character has become and how well they are imitating His Son?

I think the answer is obvious. The hard part is bucking the culture in order to accomplish it....

More on "Successful" Children

2006-06-06T09:58:00.000-05:00

I was perusing one of the blogs I frequent when I came upon this post...and it happened to coincide so well with the answer to question #3 that I thought I'd include it here.

"Doggy Obedience School for Children" (the link is no longer active, but I'm leaving the post because the point is still good) is a compelling and sad commentary on using "education" as an excuse for sending our children out of the house to the "experts" at a younger and younger age. Of course, we are doing this so they will be "successful" and "educated."

That may assuage our consciences, but it doesn't make it true or right....

Side Note

2006-06-05T23:41:00.000-05:00

Just a quick side note. As I was reading back through some of my posts, I realized that I write as I did when I was originally taught when it comes to the use of pronouns. I don't confuse a sentence by using he/she or him/her, but rather write as was once common, using "he" or "him" in a manner that the context makes it clear the statement applies to both genders.

I know that rubs some people the wrong way in this day and age...but call me old-fashioned!

Gifts or Idols? Part III

2006-06-05T19:04:00.000-05:00

Question number 3 from my earlier post asked, "That purpose (as in the purpose determined in Question #2) will be borne out in how we go about raising our children. What, exactly, is our parenting methodology?"

So much of the answer to this question depends on your answer to question number 2. In fact, the answer to this question will often reveal the true answer to question number 2, in spite of the answer one may officially give.

A parent who looks at the goal of raising children "to be successful" will typically view his children as little empty vessels in which to pour information in hopes that it will stick. He wants to expose his children to as much of this world as possible so they can "experience" it so as to help them determine where they want to go in life. He wants his children to experience and have fun all the way through young-adulthood...to get as much done as possible...before becoming tied down with a family. In short, he is focusing on his children's happiness and in a round-about way, his own reputation as a parent. He views "education" as an end in and of itself because it supposedly makes his child "successful." There really isn't a definition of what "successful" is, but the more "education" his child can get certainly contributes to that "success."

On the other hand, a parent who sees his child as a gift on loan from God, a child who was placed on this earth with a specific purpose, will approach parenting in a wholly different manner. He will search out the Scripture for wisdom. He will train up his child in the way he should go (Proverbs 22:6) by teaching him the things of God and training him to be a sage. Wisdom at a young age is quite uncommon in our world, but it isn't impossible with proper training and discipleship. I once read in an article by Chris and Ellyn Davis of "The Elijah Company", that the Hebrew word translated "...the way he should go..." is only used a couple of times in the entire Old Testament, the other being in describing the purpose of the Temple. It has connotations of being created for a specific purpose. "The way he should go" is not to be determined by the parents' dreams and desires placed upon the child. Instead we as parents must study and interact with our child, determine his "bent," and then continue to build him in that direction. Since we understand that God will not act contrary to His Word, we should ensure that the Scriptures are consulted for boundaries and directions. For instance, a young boy should not be channeled toward a career that would keep him from being able to disciple his family one day. From God's view, the development of future generations is far more important than any career one could have.

Scripture doesn't encourage us to educate or raise our children according to the scope and sequence of the world. It does set priorities for us by showing us clearly what God values. I enumerated on several of these in a previous post, but here I would like to focus on wisdom. God values wisdom. It is clear in the Proverbs that wisdom is a thing to be prayed for, to be sought after, to be prized. The word "knowledge" in the Proverbs is usually just a synonym for "wisdom." The world has more than enough "smart" people, but very, very few who are actually wise in the ways of God. A generation of Christian children raised in godly wisdom could easily send a massive shockwave through the kingdom of this world!

So before one even considers the particular giftings God has for a child, a parent can rest assured that if he trains him in the ways of Scripture, teaching him doctrine, while helping him learn to wisely apply Scripture to his daily walk...that parent will be right in the center of God's will for his child.

Back to the question: what parenting methodology should one use? I think the answer is obvious. Parents should first and foremost strive for holiness in their children, for children who love the Lord with all their hearts, minds, souls, and strength. That absolutely must be primary. Fathers should be taking the lead in this discipling, with the mothers helping out and standing in his stead when he cannot be there. Once this discipling in the ways of the Lord is firmly established, a discerning judgment should be made as to each child's particular temperament, strengths, gifts, etc. Then mold that child accordingly, helping to guide him into adulthood in all wisdom and grace.

So which of these options happens in your home? The answer to that question gives light to the real answer to question number 2 in your home, for to raise our children in the general way described at first is to raise them as self-absorbed humanists. To raise them as described in the latter portion of this post is to raise them as wise Christians who will glorify God with their lives.

Which will it be?

Gifts or Idols? Part II

2006-06-05T00:08:00.000-05:00

Question number 2 from my earlier post asked, "For what purpose are we raising our children?"

Often the pagan answer is "To be successful." Occasionally the more astute Christian will say, "To become godly adults." or "To glorify God." The problem is what that actually means in practice...but that's question #3....

Being a Christian, I want to focus on the Christian answers. I'm afraid they fall short. Sure, being godly adults and glorifying God are fine goals, but they are too broad. For those of us who embrace the sovereignty of God in all things, we understand that each child was planned before the foundation of time to be placed in our specific family and that each child also has a very specific role already laid out for him by God. God knows the plans He has for each child (and us, too, for that matter!).

So we can come back to our question and look at it a little differently. What is the purpose for which we are raising our children? That purpose has been predestined before the foundation of the earth. Our children have each been given specific gifts, talents, and strengths with which they will accomplish the good works God has planned for them. Our job as parents is to carefully study our children, to ascertain those gifts, talents, and strengths. Then we are to reference Scripture for direction (for example, for the roles given to the genders), and then capitalize upon those giftings within the confines and guidelines of the Scripture. In other words, we need to look carefully in order to try to isolate the specific purpose God already has for our children.

It is imperative that we do not just follow the ways of the world by letting others have their way with our children for countless hours each week. How could we possibly know our children well enough to make these types of determinations unless we spend the time with them? But I stray into Question #3 again....

So the bottom line is that the purpose in raising our children is very specific, and thus different for each child. Our task is to determine that purpose based on knowing our child, and knowing what Scripture has to say as well.

Gifts or Idols? Part I

2006-06-03T22:05:00.000-05:00

I asked in a previous post a series of questions. I am going to attempt to answer them to the best of my abilities and understanding, possibly just one or two per post.

Question #1 asked "Where is our focus when raising children?"

This is tough because it requires discernment. Of course, our focus is on the child. But as we focus on our children, we need to ask if we can properly focus on God. Focus implies prioritizing. Do we unconsciously make our children our first priority, our spouse our second priority, and God our third priority? I think an honest introspection in a quiet moment will reveal that this is often the case. It may not be the case 100% of the time, but I'm willing to state that there are at least times in life where it does happen.

Let us not forget that God will not take second place in our lives. He rightly and justly demands first place, no matter what we may think of the needs of our children. When we place the children first, we are saying we know better than God...and that is pride speaking. So as we rise up each day, is it given over to the Lord? Do we trust Him with its activities and outcome? This isn't just a time of quiet worship in the morning...it is a moment-by-moment decision. For example... You didn't get all the items the experts from the curriculum development company said you should do today because your child needed some extra attention in another area or because there was a ministry opportunity for your family. Do you get overwhelmed and frustrated...burned out? Do you trust God with the outcome? Or do you fear the experts' dreaded scope and sequence more? Where is your focus?

OK... so I'll focus on God first. I'll trust Him with every moment of my day. Then I'll focus on my child. Uh...not so fast. There is another priority: your spouse.

We all have heard the admonition that the best gift we can give our children is to love their other parent. We all nod our heads in agreement...and then go on to put that love for the other parent in a position far below its proper priority. Where in the priority order would God have you put your spouse/marriage? I believe He would have it in second place...right behind Himself. He created the institution of marriage to reflect the relationship between Jesus and His Church. As such, He highly values marriage...over and above the raising of children. In Genesis, marriage came before children!

But it's funny how putting God first, putting your spouse and marriage second naturally results in a good and proper environment for the raising of children! In fact, when you prioritize this way, little Johnny and little Jenny discover their proper place in the family...they aren't in charge and the world doesn't revolve around them!

So, where's your focus in raising your child? Let's all get on our knees, repent as needed, and then put our focus on our Father in heaven, followed by our spouse and our marriage...and then watch our children blossom in the fertile garden of the home that is then created.

Children: Gifts on Loan from God...or Idols?

2006-06-01T23:51:00.000-05:00

Over on my Get Serious blog (link on the left), I was commenting on what a typical evangelical Christian tends to look like...generalized, of course. In the process I mentioned that we often make idols out of our children. I suppose this is the blog on which that topic ought to be fleshed out further...and I'll have to do it at another time (getting late and have to earn a living in the morning).

But some questions to ponder (Each is linked to its particular answer):

1) Where is our focus when we are raising our children?

2) For what purpose are we raising our children?

3) That purpose will be borne out in how we go about raising our children. What, exactly, is our parenting methodology?

4) By our parenting methodology, where do our children learn to focus?

5) How important is your child's self-esteem?

6) Could the answers to these questions have something to do with why today's teens and young adults are so self-centered?

7) Could the answers to these questions also have anything to do with the huge number of young adults raised in Evangelical Christian homes walking away from their faith?

Hmmmm....

Arrows

2006-05-30T22:46:00.000-05:00

In Psalm 127, children are referred to as arrows in the hands of a warrior and that a blessed man has a quiver full of them. Often, this analogy to arrows is interpreted as meaning we should spend their childhood aiming them carefully so when they are released into adulthood, they will fly straight to the target.

My daughter purchased a bow and arrow set a couple of summers ago. We quickly found out that arrows require a lot of work...and these were only cheap target-practice arrows. They must be kept clean. They must have their feathers kept straight. They must be kept balanced. Their tip must be kept sharp. And on top of the maintenance, they are continually getting lost...and must be searched for since small allowances don't allow for easy replacement! Higher-end hunting arrows are far more complicated and require far more care...and are far more expensive as well.

This got me to thinking about how we interpret the analogy.

The common interpretation allows that we only release the arrow once toward a target. In the real world of archery, though, the arrow is aimed, released to the target, and then retrieved to be cleaned up and used again. How might this apply to the raising of our children?

I propose that we should be training up our children in the same manner that an accomplished archer cares for his arrows: sharpening, balancing, straightening, etc. Then we should do as the archer does: carefully aim and release toward a target. Assuming the archer is a hunter, the arrow would do massive damage to its target. We should be releasing our sharpened, balanced, straightened children toward a target in the world to do damage to the kingdom of this world in the name of the Kingdom of God! But we aren't done. The archer will track down his target, recover his arrow, repair it, and use it again. So our children should be recovered to our home, "repaired" as needed, and launched again to do battle.

This is all done before they leave the nest for good. They are sent out to minister in the name of the Lord. They are recovered and rejuvenated and sent out again. Think of the experiences they will have. Think of the training they will get. Think of the ways they will see God work in their lives. Think of the mark they will leave in the world. Think of the way they will be significantly different than the other teens of this world. Think of the Gospel impact!

I will never think of the analogy of the arrow the same again....

Primary Consideration

2006-05-28T21:09:00.000-05:00

As a Christian, my primary consideration at all times should be to please my Father in Heaven, to be in His will. How do I know what that will is? As I posted on my "Get Serious" blog (link on the left), we all too often look for God's will in terms of feelings or circumstances instead of looking where we will actually find it: His Holy Scripture! You can guarantee that if you are ordering your life around the principles, patterns, and precepts of the Scriptures, that you are completely within God's will! Pretty simple, right?

Simple in concept...a bit more difficult in execution. Some things must be studied carefully in order to properly interpret Scripture. That requires work, diligent work.

So...for instance...what does God value, and how does that relate to the education of our children? I'm sure I will post an incomplete list...but it's a start!

God values our hearts. He wants us to love Him with all our heart, mind, soul, and strength. That sounds pretty comprehensive, if you ask me.

God values our "fear." i.e. we are often commanded to "fear the Lord." He wants our complete attention. When one "fears" God, then one can rest assured that he will give God his complete attention!

God values wisdom. What kind of wisdom? Not the wisdom of the world, but rather God's own wisdom as grasped from the Scriptures, both through doctrine and through the wisdom literature of the OT.

God values our obedience. Over and over we are told that our love for the Lord is shown in our obedience to His commands.

So...our hearts, our "fear," God's wisdom, and our obedience. That's a good start. Then, what are the implications to educating our children?

First, in no way is any school's (public or private) scope and sequence going to help us raise our children in a manner that encourages them to give their whole heart to God, to fear the Lord, to gain godly wisdom, or to obey the Lord's commands. If we are constantly comparing our efforts at home to what is happening to those in the school system or in private school, we will be drawn away from what the Lord truly wants by focusing our attention on what the world says is important.

Second, God gave us children with an end in mind...a life He already has planned out for them. Our job is to help discover that life with them by carefully observing them, working with them, noting their strengths and weaknesses...and then guiding them carefully to an end, always squaring what we are doing with the roles as defined by Scripture.

And this then helps to clarify why my blog is titled the way it is: We as homeSCHOOLers tend to spend way too much time focusing on trying to do "school" (the same scope and sequence as the world) better than the schools themselves, all while practicing an avoidance ethic for all the practices and ideas we don't like. This tends to cause us to ignore that which is truly important and truly desired by God...the discipling of our children. If it happens at all, it is usually a sloppy second to the primary goal of competing with the group school.

Thus my hope that more and more people will rename what they are doing with their children from "Homeschooling" to "HomeDiscipling!"

If we carry out that discipling, I really think we will raise children who will make a massive impact for the Kingdom as they grow.

I think God would be pleased....

The Long View

2006-05-26T14:33:00.000-05:00

Ahhh...children. When they arrive into this world, there is nothing like it. We look down the corridor of time and hope. Hope? For what? For most of us, we don't have a concrete goal for the raising of our children. Oh sure, we may have some general thoughts such as "Raise them to be Godly," but for the most part, it isn't concrete nor is there any plan for how to get there if it is.

So for the parent who loves Jesus and wants to raise children who love Him with all their heart, soul, mind, and strength...what do we do? What is our goal? How do we pursue it?

That's the general idea of this blog...challenging the typical parenting ideas that are so prevalent in our society. Could it be that those very parenting ideas are why children, teens, and young adults are the way they are, and thus our society is degenerating at every turn?

Do I have all the answers? No. But I'll start and end as best I can with Scripture. Only there can we have any hope of getting it right.